Doing flips

Baby Girl

2012-01-06T12:01:00.000-08:00

So after two years of silence on this blog, I thought this would be the best vehicle to announce baby girl's name.

Baby girl deserves some time on the blog after all. I often come back to this blog and reminisce about about my pregnancy with Levi and his first year and half. I know I'll be happy later if I do the same about my daughter. Plus Levi says the funniest and most profound things sometimes like what he said when we asked him what his baby sister's name means)! It'd be nice to have a record of those things.

I stressed over a name for a long time. We found out she was most likely a girl during an ultrasound at 13 weeks (way earlier than I expected). We confirmed it at 17 weeks, and the doc confirmed it again at 20, so we're pretty sure she's a girl!

I love Levi's name. It's jam packed with special meaning - it's a summary of the man I hope he turns out to be - and it's just a cool name too. You don't run into a lot of Levi's around, but it's not a strange name either. (more on why we chose his name here and here)

I was finding it very hard to name our baby girl some generic name that wasn't special. I just couldn't find a special enough name. I didn't think I was going to be able to. I spent hours on the baby name websites, and scouring meanings of names. There aren't an abundance of women to name a girl after in the bible - and our family names are all pretty dated (Brenda, Debra, Geneva, Virginia).

I have a hard time with the fact that I have to choose a name in the first place. I feel like a name should be predetermined - like eye color or temperament. It feels really strange to be in charge of what someone is called - what someone will live with for the rest of their lives. It's huge task, and one that I take very seriously - probably too seriously. After all, there are no shortage of beautiful names that I love : Hannah, Grace, Audrey, Chloe - but none of them had the meaning I was hoping for. Sure some of them mean nice things (who doesn't love grace?), but none of them had the narrative, the big story, like Levi's name.

Then Christmas season was upon us. I'm not sure if it was in part due to my hormones or the amount of time talking to Levi about what Christmas means - but it took on a whole new meaning for me this year. I could not listen to a song on the radio about the baby Jesus without winding up in tears.

I reflected a lot this year on what the birth of Jesus meant to the world. Christmas time is the most beautiful time of the year. People take great effort in making their homes look more beautiful, smell more beautiful, and taste more beautiful. I know that not everyone is doing this as an act of worship to the One who gave us Christmas - but to me as a Christian, those beautiful lights everywhere were screaming out "JOY TO THE WORLD, THE LORD HAS COME."

I think we, even devout Christians, have become desensitized to the Jesus story. Blah blah blah, born of a virgin, yadda, yadda, yadda, laid in a manger, such and such, saved the world, and so on. But think about it. The God of the universe, the one who created everything, the one who sustains everything, the one who lives in total perfection and in total comfort, left everything to become one of us. To live among us. Not only that, but in such a humble way. I'm not sure how I ever lived without the electric blanket that I got for Christmas this year - and I sure don't want to spend the night in a barn on a bed of hay! He became the least among us, fully knowing his fate - rejection and death - for a world full of sinners. It's times like these where I wish I had the gift of writing. Nothing I can write can fully express what dwelling on that truth does to my heart.

So, Jarrod and I have decided to name our baby girl Noelle. What an extra bonus for me that it's a French word! There is nothing more important, or more beautiful in the world or in human history than what happened on the First Noel 2000+ years ago.

I like to teach Levi french words, so he knows that Christmas is Noel in French. So when we told him the name, I asked him what it meant expecting him to say "Christmas," but instead he said "it means Jesus is alive and came to earth so that we could have joy in our hearts." What a great definition!

"the look"

2010-05-20T11:10:00.000-07:00

This, in terms of photography, is not the best picture in the world - but it is an amazing shot! This is "the look," and I'm so glad I was able to capture it on film (or digital file, whatever.)

This is the look my precious angel baby gets on his face when he decides he's not going to be quite so angelic anymore. In this case, he was playing dominos at an old gas station thing in the Historical Park. He was having a great time with these dominos, but decided he would throw one. He got a firm "no," and was told if he threw another one then we would have to leave. He was good for a few minutes while I snapped some quick pictures of him. Then he slowly lowered a domino closer to his lap, gave me this look, and intentionally let the domino slip out of his hand onto the porch- just to see how far he could push me, and to find out if I meant business. I scooped him up and off we went - with a toddler kicking and screaming along the way. Did he learn his lesson? Maybe, but I know he will continue to test me and push me to see if I mean what I say. Sometimes it's really inconvenient to be consistent, but hopefully I can remain strong so that these looks become fewer and fewer as we get out of the toddler years. But I am glad I have this one to keep :-)

Here are a few more pictures from before the tantrum:

PS, to all my photography friends who read this blog (you know who you are), this would be an awesome place for a photoshoot!

Levi's Vocabulary

2010-05-15T19:48:00.001-07:00

Here you can see most of his vocab skills. He has trouble with Tiger in this video, but that's usually his favorite:

Mother's Day

2010-05-12T19:54:00.000-07:00

We all know Levi is not a big talker, up until this mother's day weekend his vocabulary has been:

Bath
Ball
Bubble
Apple
Kroger
Cracker
Tuba
huhuuuuh (what a donkey says)
mmm (what a cow says)
RAAA (what a Tiger says)
and his favorite, DA DEEEEEEEE (daddy, huge emphasis on the last syllable)
There may be a few I'm missing, but that's pretty much it.

I've been waiting patiently, and appropriately, Levi added another word to his vocabulary this weekend:

MOMMA!!!!

Every time he would try to say mamma before, he would put his lips together (like he does for the cow sound), but then end up saying mmmmba, or mmmmpa.

Really though, Levi? Saying Kroger, Bubble, and Tuba before momma? I guess he was waiting for this weekend.

The best came yesterday though as we were playing blocks. He stopped his stacking, put his block down, looked at me, said "momma" and gave me a hug. Then kept hugging me for the next few minutes. One of the happiest moments ever.

Pier Family

2010-04-14T17:44:00.000-07:00

Levi is very interested in reading and identifying things right now. We can hardly go thirty minutes without reading. If he had his way, he would be read to every minute that he wasn't eating or swinging or watching the washing machine. (his grandma introduced him to the wonderful world of the washing machine, and he asks me about thirty times a day to watch our washing machine - and sometimes has pretty big meltdowns when he is denied.)

This boy can identify all his farm animals, even on pictures he's never seen before. He can also pick out circles, squares (although he does get squares and rectangles confused sometimes), ovals, and stars - he has trouble with diamonds and triangles.

I thought my family would be interested in seeing Levi point to people in the picture. This book is now Levi's book, since Phoebe already destroyed the corner. It's pretty beat up, because Levi LOVES to "read" this one!

On my youtube page, you can also see Levi saying "grandpa" and pointing to the groomsmen and the Robertson family.

Baby Shower for my Bestie!

2010-04-08T12:51:00.000-07:00

If you want to see details of the baby shower I co-hosted for Jennifer, I have all the details up over at my other blog, Frugal Home Ideas. Oh, and if you didn't know about my other blog, here it is! Just some ideas, mostly decorating.

My Little Architect

2010-03-16T12:18:00.001-07:00

He may not be a man of many words yet, but look what he figured out:

Pretty good, huh?

Put one foot in front of the other...

2010-02-05T21:38:00.000-08:00

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Levi's Song

2010-01-07T18:45:00.000-08:00

Ever since Levi was a few months old, Jarrod would hum this tune he made up to him. He may not have actually made it up, it's familiar sounding, but if it comes from somewhere else we don't know where.

Jarrod usually puts different words to it. It's usually "Levi, baby boy, Levi little baby boy," but the lyrics often change with whatever's going on.

Levi recognizes his song. Jarrod will sometimes play it for him on the tuba, and he just goes cheesy happy! Jarrod can be in the middle of playing something else and Levi will be playing with his toys - and as soon as Jarrod starts playing this song, he wildly turns around and dances or smiles. He can be in the middle of whining - but when "his" song starts playing his mood does a complete 180 (as you'll see in the following clip).

Here's Levi being really tired and whiny while Jarrod is practicing. I asked Jarrod to play Levi's song, and took a video of Levi's response. This happens 100% of the time:

Pictures

2010-01-04T09:10:00.000-08:00

So, we had an amazing talented friend take pictures of Levi a few days before he turned 1. She did a fabulous job! Of course she did have a pretty adorable subject :-)

Thank you so much, Diedra. Capturing Levi at this age being able to remember him just as he is right now is the best I could get!

Levi's First Year

2009-12-09T08:46:00.000-08:00

Levi, I cannot believe it's been one year. Exactly one year ago today I was staring into your face for the first time, and trying to feed you :-)

It doesn't seem like it's been a year, but at the same time when I look at pictures of your little newborn self, it seems like that was a lifetime ago.

Oh little Levi, I will never let you go - you have stolen my heart - and you will ALWAYS be my baby.

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Details on his first year to come.

The Best Turkey Ever!!

2009-11-26T07:40:00.001-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving

From the sweetest turkey of all time!

Mamma Bear

2009-11-16T20:09:00.000-08:00

I had an ugly moment today. The kind of moment that you don't plan for. The kind of moment that once passed you wish you could go back and change.

I'm probably over reacting - but it struck me hard.

Today Levi and I went to the mall with our best friends Jennifer and Olivia. Olivia was playing with a toy on the wall, and a little boy came up and pushed her totally out the way to play with it. At the same time, Levi was crawling toward the toy to pull up and play on it. This little boy was hitting the toy wildly and when Levi got close enough to touch the toy... the boy started hitting Levi.

I was sitting right there next to them and at the same moment I flew out of my seat grabbed the little boy's hands, put my most meanest face on and said very sternly "You do NOT hit my little boy!!"

Levi was upset and cried. I'm not sure if he cried because the boy hit him, or if he cried because of his crazed mother's reaction.

Before I even sat down I regretted my reaction. It was just that - a reaction. I acted on impulse and out of anger. It was the first time I had every seen anyone try to deliberately hurt my baby, and I lost control. Once I got back to my seat with my crying baby, I realized that this boy was just a baby himself. Probably around 2.

I feel terrible that Levi witnessed me lose control. I feel terrible that I must have scared that kid. Granted he doesn't need to go around pushing and hitting the other kids - it was not my place to discipline him.

I also am so disappointed in myself because when you react to something you're acting out what's really in your heart. I didn't take the time to think about what I should do - I just acted purely on what my nature told me to do. My nature is mean, I learned tonight.

I never want to react when disciplining my own child. I never want to lose control. I never want to discipline out of anger - but always out of love. (I don't mean that I want to discipline less - I just want to do it productively and with the right spirit and motives. Motives to teach and edify, not to seek revenge or release my anger). I don't want my child to obey out of fear of getting in trouble, but because he truly understands right and wrong, and why to choose to do the right thing. And the way he will do that is if his parents use times of discipline as learning opportunities instead of screaming matches.

How do I change my nature so that when times arise when I don't have time to think - I react in a productive manner that helps the situation? How do I change my anger into love? How to I change the default setting on my heart from over-reacting raging mamma bear to a controlled and concerned parent who could use a situation like the one above as a learning opportunity?

This would all be fine if I could have a few minutes to think before getting into the ring - but our gut reaction is what matters - it's what shows us what's really in our hearts. I need to change my gut.

Being able to react in a controlled productive manner can only come if I see the world the way God does. Unconditional Love. The Impossible.

I think I need to go read Proverbs now and memorize a chapter or two. I need to hide it in my heart so that it can appear during these situations instead of ...

11 MONTHS!!!

2009-11-09T08:03:00.000-08:00

Where do I start? I don't even know. Aside from his pretty severe stranger anxiety / separation anxiety, he has been so fun this month. He is looking more and more like a little boy and less and less like a baby (although I think it'll be a long time before he loses that baby face, those cheeks aren't going anywhere for a while!)

His separation anxiety breaks my heart - just kills me. I knew it would be hard to leave a crying baby, but I never imagined it would be this hard. I think part of it has to do with I'm just not used to hearing him cry. Maybe if he would have cried as a young infant, I would be desensitized to it a bit more? Maybe not. Probably not. He won't cry for me as I drop him off at Junior High, so I just need to have faith that this will pass - but it feels like it never will.

On the lighter side - Levi is a HOOT! The boy is just hilarious. He has a personality about 1,000 miles wide. He makes the funniest faces and sounds. He loves attention and will just about anything for you to clap for him. He's discovered that he can get attention for his adorable head tilt (and he uses this one A LOT), and his weird grunt sounds (we prefer the head tilt :-)).

He LOVES to play pattycake. Once you start he won't let you stop. He just keeps clapping and he'll even crawl over to me and clap my hands together for me if I stop.

His favorite things are still: Airplanes, the moon, the tuba, any food (but especially goldfish), baby Einstein, his "home computer" (toy laptop),and Phoebe. Whenever he plays with something, whether he's pushing a car, or feeling something, or pushing a button - he always uses his first two fingers. (you can see this in his video when he's touching his book and when he's pushing his car.) He LOVES to operate the light switches!

He hasn't added any words to his vocabulary, in fact I think he's dropped some (which makes me wonder if he ever had them to begin with). When he's really excited about something, he says "dah." This word happens mostly when Daddy comes home, when a light gets turned on, or when the tuba comes out.

He FINALLY has teeth. His two bottom front ones are in, and you can see his top ones making their way down.

He is a very obedient boy. He knows what things are off limits. He will test us though. He will get as close as he can to the outlet, or dog bowl and look at it then look back at me, then look at it, then look back at me. He'll even reach his hand out and get as close as he can to touching it without actually touching it. One time he accidentally threw his ball and it landed in the Phoebe's bowl. I let him fish it out and not get in trouble - bad idea. Now instead of touching the bowl (which he knows is a "no no") he will bring a toy over and put it in the bowl and then get the toy out. Little smarty pants!

He knows that he's not allowed to put acorns in his mouth. So this is what he does and it drives me nuts. He will pick up an acorn and act like he is putting in his mouth, but put the back of his hand up to his lips instead. Or sometimes he'll look at me and act like he's putting something in his mouth and his pincer grasp will be empty. That boy!

He loves to eat! (as if you couldn't tell by looking at him) He's feeding himself now, and most of the time he won't look up from his tray. He has his head down and those fingers going until everything is gone - then he'll look up and want more. I have not put anything in front of him that he will not eat.

He is a studious boy. He would much rather study a toy or a leaf or something than be tickled. He examines things and analyzes them and moves on to the next thing. He loves to problem solve. I think we're going to have a smart boy on our hands.

I love him. I am proud of him. I miss him when he's asleep (except when I'm trying to sleep). I want to keep him a baby forever. I want to hurry up and watch him grow up. Please let me know when you've figured out how to do that one!

Enjoy his second to last slideshow of his first year! I just can't believe it.

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

This one's for Granny

2009-11-02T20:26:00.000-08:00

Granny, the librarian.

Today was Levi's first trip to the public library. He loved it! We picked out books about puppies and airplanes - his favorites! Next time I'll look for something about the moon, also his favorite. He had a nice time playing with the toys and seeing the other children. After we had gotten all of our books we went out to the creek behind the library to watch the ducks. Levi particularly enjoyed the geese and their very loud vocal display. They were not scared of Levi, and Levi was certainly not afraid of them. I had to keep them separated.

I think next week we're going to attend the story time for 1 year olds. ONE YEAR OLDS! Exactly one year ago today was my baby shower, and today I spent the day making invitations to his first birthday. I just can't believe it.

Tricks and Treats!

2009-10-31T19:37:00.000-07:00

Levi's New Trick:

Levi's First Treat:

He had his first tastes of candy over at Grandma and Grandaddy's house. He loved the twizzler from the neighbor! This is the first time I'd ever seen a turkey eat a twizzler :-)

Isn't he the most irresistible turkey you've ever seen?

My mom called him a butterball. I think that's an approriate name for him (Turkey costume or not)

Looking for Acorns. One of is favorite things to do. Too bad Daddy sucked them all up in the shop vac today. The deck was COVERED

He found a few left over Acorns.

Speaking of Acorns, we have some of the most bizarre looking acorns I've ever seen in our front yard. Maybe you all have seen acorns that look like this, but this was new and shocking to me when I saw them for the first time shortly after moving in.

Here are the nice friendly normal acorns that Levi plays with in our backyard:

And here are the monster acorns on steriods that come off of our tree in the front yard:

I am a little concerned that one of these acorns are going to do some serious damage to one of our brains! Can you imagine that acorn falling from 20 feet and landing on your head? We were outside today collecting some of them to put in a vase for some nice fall decor, and as we were discussing them falling off our tree, THREE came barrelling down to the ground. They were no where near us, but we decided to look at my car and saw 2 dents in the trunk area where they have fallen onto the car. Good reason to get the garage cleared out and functional!

Hope you all had a nice safe Halloween!

Little Show-off

2009-10-27T10:39:00.000-07:00

While having lunch the other day, Levi was doing this weird new grunt thing (this child and grunting, geez!) and I laughed. He enjoyed me laughing at him, so he did it again - and I laughed again. This went on for a while, so I got my camera. Please ignore my fake laughing - I'm not a great actress I guess.

After he was done grunting I tried to get him to do his babbling, you'll see his head shake (his new dance) and his head tilt, of course. Whenever he wants some attention he pulls out all these tricks. I guess he was loving the camera!

Big Scary World!

2009-10-17T19:37:00.001-07:00

My little boy has realized that he lives in a big scary world. The same things that once elicited joy and laughter are now terrifying. These frightening things include:

Dancing bears playing the violin on his baby Einstein DVD
Images of a lawn mower
Counting to three
People

Yes, I said counting to three. I think this is because I always count to three before I make a scary noise like the food processor or the vacuum that way he is prepared for the sound and thinks something fun is about to happen. Well, those fun things like the food processor and vacuum cleaner are not so fun anymore. Counting to three now makes him think that something really scary is going to happen.

Poor Poor boy.

We had a night of worship tonight at church. I went with him into the room where it was mostly big kids playing with balls and such. He was very uncomfortable so I stayed and played with him for a little bit. It was so cute, there was a very nice lady in there trying to play with Levi but you could see the terror in his eyes. Sometimes he would look at her and just cry, then other times he would look at her and do a really uncomfortable laugh - like he was trying to be brave but he really wanted to cry. He really was trying hard, poor little guy. Once I felt like he was comfortable I slipped away. I peeked in on him through the window and saw that same lady was holding him and he had his pacifier. (I only give him his pacifier when he sleeps) I was not upset that they gave him his paci, I was just upset that he [thought] needed it. I took a pager with me and toward the end of the service it went off. I went back and the same lady was holding him and he had stopped crying, but I could tell he had been crying hard because he was doing those involuntary heaves that you do after you finish a bad cry. Poor boy.

I don't know what to do about this new fear. I don't know whether to scoop him up right away and let him know that he's safe and cuddle him and hold him close. I don't know if I should distract him or try to make the scary thing funny. I don't know if cuddling him and soothing him will encourage the fear - or confirm his belief that the object of his fear is indeed something to be afraid of. I talked to a parent who I admire very much at church tonight who said she's been auditing a lot of family counseling classes at the seminary and says she wishes she would have done differently with her first three children. She suggested scooping Levi up and reassuring him, and making sure he knows he's safe with momma. She said all the stuff that she learned about attachment and security issues have convinced her that this is the best way to handle the situation and that she wishes she could go back and hold her other three children just a little more.

Maybe I should head her advice. I don't know. I just don't want my boy to be afraid. Any suggestions? Know how long this will last?

P.S. If you see Levi and he is frightened by you, please don't be offended.

Life imitating art... kind of

2009-10-11T15:40:00.000-07:00

Levi always enjoys watching his slideshows (so does his mom), so we've watched it about three or four times now and EVERY time we get to the video of him and his head tilt - he will tilt his head too!

What a cutie.

10 month slideshow

2009-10-10T09:09:00.000-07:00

Happy Ten Months Levi! Last month you spent most of your days with your grandparents so that we could get our new house ready to live in. While we are so so grateful that we were able to get our house into the shape it is now, and while you had so much fun with your grandma and grandaddy - - It's always better when we're together!

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

My Big Boy!

2009-10-09T19:56:00.000-07:00

Today Levi turns 10 months old. This month has been equally the most fun and also the most challenging month in my parenting career. He is developing such a cute little personality, but I'm now having to discipline him and figure out what the right balance of TLC - discipline. I'm trying to figure out when he just needs momma because his mouth hurts and when I need to let him just whine so that he will learn to entertain himself.

Levi is morphing into a little boy right before my eyes. It's incredible to realize what he understands and how he's able to communicate a little better with us.

He is now a crawler. At first his little back legs moved faster than his arms - but he's got it all figured out now. He is pulling up and starting to cruise around furniture. He has become a little less content than usual, and I'm hoping that it's because I see two shiny white teeth JUST below his gums. Actually, they are raising his gums quite a bit and I'm surprised that the gum hasn't given up yet.

Now that he is mobile, he has discovered a few new favorite toys: outlets, stray leaves, remote controls, cell phones, dog food, and the most exciting thing - the TUBA. He has learned what "no" means, and is pretty compliant. He has learned that Phoebe's bowls are off limits, but he will very very slowly reach for them as daddy and I are watching without his knowledge. He will almost touch the bowl and then stop, then slowly move his hand toward the bowl again. He eventually put his fingers on the bowl and then we intervened. He now knows that outlets are off limits and pretty much steers clear of those now - such a good boy.

He LOVES birds and airplanes and the moon. We go on a lot of walks and Levi will just stare at the moon while his daddy carries him. We live a few houses down from a busy street and he really enjoys watching the cars.

He LOVES to play pattycake, and once you start he won't let you stop unless you distract him. He will continue to clap his hands hoping that you'll play another round of pattycake.

He LOVES to listen to his daddy play the Tuba. He will just sit and look up at him, and now he will pull up and touch the tuba and rest against Jarrod's legs while he plays.

He LOVES goldfish. I let him have a few after dinner every night so he can practice picking up his food, and when he sees me walk in from the pantry with the package he almost knocks the chair over he gets so excited.

He enjoys being outside and swinging on his swingset.

He LOVES Phoebe. He just thinks she is the funniest thing in the world. He's starting to chase her a little (although Levi isn't exactly a speed racer). He grabs her, and she will jump back, but not move far enough away from him for him not to continue grabbing her. I'm not sure what to do about that, because I don't want to get onto Levi about grabbing her and make Phoebe think she's doing something wrong and make her dislike Levi even more. (she doesn't dislike him, but if she had her way she'd be the only child).

Levi's vocabulary is expanding a little, he definitely says dad and bird, but I think he might be saying moon and ball too.
-dada
-ball (ba)
-Bird (buhr)
-Moon (moh)

The other night I asked him where his ball was, and he crawled to the other side of the room picked it up and said "ba." This happened twice today too, so I feel pretty sure that he's saying it.

He is clapping. It's so funny because he will be playing and very wrapped up in whatever he's doing, but if he hears someone say "yay" or if the TV is on and he hears applause he will drop everything and clap. He is waving too.

Almost every night when Jarrod and I go to bed, we stay up and just talk about how amazing Levi is. We recount all the cute things he did that day and talk about how beyond blessed we are to be his parents.

His 10 month slideshow should be up sometime tomorrow. The pictures are taking longer than usual to load on our new internet connection.

What? You wallpapered your bedroom?

2009-09-22T06:03:00.000-07:00

I am participating in Rhoda's Beadboard wallpaper party over a Southern Hospitality.

When purchasing a home, I dreamed of something with character and architectural interest. We did get a cute little 50s home, but it didn't come with quite the character I was crossing my fingers for.

So I put it in myself!

I knew we were going to do beadboard or wainscoting of some sort in the master. We used beadboard panels on our kitchen peninsula, which turned out AMAZING! I'll reveal the kitchen soon, I promise - we just got our oven yesterday.

Then one day, I stumbled across THIS POST!!!! I couldn't believe it! I yelled for Jarrod to come look as quick as he could. "LOOK HONEY, THEY MAKE BEADBOARD WALLPAPER!!!" Of course, he didn't share quite the same enthusiasm as I did about this new found treasure. Then I told him how much it would save us to do the wallpaper in lieu of the paneling - and he perked up a little bit more.

Remember my vision for the room?

It's still a work in progress, the chair rail and baseboards need to be caulked, then I'm going to paint all the trim and the wallpaper itself a glossy white.

I would show you more angles of the room, but you would see some pretty awful paper blinds that have paint on them because I wasn't careful when painting because I knew I was replacing them. I am on the lookout for fabric to do a nice DIY roman shade there.

I hesitate though, because I'm not sure I love the wall color after all. I love the blue a lot, and I picked it because I wanted a stark contrast - but I think this is way too stark. I also had these bed linens to work with, and new bed linens were not in the budget.

What do you think? Any suggestions?

How I saved 95% on wall Decor

2009-09-20T19:41:00.000-07:00

I love you Pottery Barn.

Too bad I have never purchased a single item from you - and probably never will, because you're just TOO EXPENSIVE!!!

I am, however, lucky enough to be the recipient of the world's most awesomest diaper bag from Pottery Barn Kids (yes, awesomest is a word) that a dear friend got for me.

Unless any other dear friends want to buy me something from Pottery Barn (which you are more than welcome to), you will never see anything from that store in my home.

Here are two reasons why:

1. You can usually find the same looking stuff at Ross or Marshalls (it may not be the same quality, but at this point in my life I'm not really looking for longevity)

2. You can MAKE the stuff yourself.

Let's explore Reason #2.

Here is Pottery Barn's Modern Ledge

This is exactly what I was looking for when I imagined this for Levi's new room:

So, off to the Home Depot and Salvation Army I went, and gathered the following materials for my project:

4 ugly picture frames from the Salvation Army bursting with potential: $5
1 6 foot long 1X2 cut in half: $3
1 8 foot long piece of Brick Moulding cut to size and mitered: $10

I gave the poor outdated picture frames a new fresh makeover, and painted all my other materials with some satin finish black spray paint.

Next you take your favorite tool: your handy dandy husband, to attach the 1X2s to the wall. We (I mean He), just used 3.5 inch long screws and hung them directly into the wall.

So then you end up with your anchors. If I did this over again, I would have gone for the the 1X3 or maybe even 1X4. 2 inches was not as deep as I wanted.

The next step entails power tools, although I'm sure you could do this with a miter box and a really strong arm. We (he) mitered the trim moulding so that the moulding fit together like a box:

Then we (he) took a nail gun and nailed these pieces directly onto our anchors. I did not want it exactly flush on top so that there would be a little lip to rest some frames against. (I still need to touch up and paint over the nails, but I'll get to that when my next 1,000 projects are done).

Shield your eyes from the horrible natural wood color blinds. One of my next 1,000 projects is to make a faux roman shade for that window.

The Vision:

Starting to come together:

And that's it! It took (not including paint drying time) probably about 1 hour, and cost only $18 including the frames! Compare that to $90 for only the ledges themselves over at Pottery Barn. Granted, you could probably find comparable ledges at Kohls or Ross for probably about $20 each, but you would still save more than half and be proud of something you created!

And then, for all your hardwork, you can treat yourself to one of these like we did:

If you want to, you could have one the next night - and then even the next night too. But then you'd stop because you wouldn't want to go overboard or anything. Dang it Braums... if you just wouldn't play that irresistible banana split commercial during the Oprah show!

Now all I need to do is the chalkboard paint, the mirror, and get the toy box/bucket/drawer thing that I have my eye on from IKEA and make a roman shade and I'll be done with that wall in that room. Phew.

Next on the list: Adding Architectural interest to the master bedroom using WALLPAPER! What?!?! Wallpaper?!?! Isn't this 2009?

You'll see ;-)

Lucky

2009-09-15T20:58:00.000-07:00

I went grocery shopping with my little boy in tow. I swear, every aisle that we went down someone stopped me and told me how precious Levi is. This one elderly lade with an oxygen tank came up to me, looked at Levi, touched me on the arm and said "Do you know how lucky you are?" and I said "I am very blessed," to which she replied "many many many blessings."

She is right.

---

Now that he is crawling, he has been introduced to the word "no." I think he's finally learning what it means, because today he was going for the outlet (his favorite toy) and I told him "no" and he looked back at me and did his look-how-cute-I-am head tilt thing.

I finally got his head tilt on video:

Just in the past few days this kid has figured out how to crawl all across the house on his hands and knees, pull up to a standing position, wave, and clap! THIS WEEK! I can also see his teeth beneath the gums and he's been putting his fingers in his mouth a lot (which surprisingly for a baby he really never does.)

Just thought I'd give you an update on the cutest boy around - just ask the folks at my neighborhood Tom Thumb.

Entryway

2009-09-12T20:06:00.000-07:00

WE HAVE INTERNET AT OUR HOUSE!!!!

We actually now have some stuff up on our walls, and only a few boxes left to unpack.

We still have little projects to take care of all over the house, but I feel settled for the most part - and that feels marvelous!!

I thought I would show you another art project I did for the entry way. Here's the before with a giant mirror that greeted you as soon as you walked in the door. Creepy.

Here is the after. I painted the inside of the niche the same color as an accent wall in the living area it leads in to.

This art project was really easy (it has to be if I'm going to attempt it). It is just canvases covered in textured wallpaper that I painted. Lowes had their textured wallpaper on sale for something like $3 and I already had the canvases from another project that failed miserably.

I covered the canvases in wallpaper, then painted them (our cabinet color). Then I took a little of the paint I used on the wall that these go on and mixed it with the brown to make a slightly lighter hue. I very lightly rolled over the canvases with this color, and it highlighted the raised part and it barely touched the parts that weren't raised giving it a distressed look. Then I went over the raised parts again with a small brush with the plain wall color. I think the art itself turned out pretty well, I just wish it covered more of the "niche." I may have to move the canvases closer together.

Here is a detail shot

I got the canvases on sale for $2.50 I believe, so the whole project was $13!

I love doing these projects, I just wish I could think of them myself. This one came courtesy of Thrifty Decor Chick. I love her blog!

Nine Months

2009-09-10T15:24:00.000-07:00

There will not be a nine month slideshow (yet) for 2 reasons.

1. We don't have internet

2. I didn't take the usual 17 pictures and videos of him a day, since I wasn't with him for most of the day during this month of his life :-(

That boy is such an amazing little patoot! He is not quite crawling, but he's getting from point A to point B. He is up on his hands and knees all the time with a lot of rocking, great backward motion, and a little bit of forward motion. He likes to crawl backwards until he is in a sitting position.

He also is saying a few words, well one for sure. His first word was "bird" (if not "daddy). He loves the "da" syllable so much it's hard to tell if it's on purpose, although it really seems to be. But he is definitely saying bird. While over at his grandma and grandaddy, he has spent quite a bit of time outside looking up at the birds and the planes. If you ask him where the birds are (even if you're inside), he'll look up. He clear as day will see a bird and say "bur."

He is doing this adorable head tilt thing that I wish I could capture on video, but he is such a turkey when we get out the camera!

He is still sleeping about 8 hours (sometimes we'll get lucky and get a 10 hour night). But he either goes straight back to sleep after a bottle, or will play for less than an hour and then take a great nap (2-3 hours). He still also needs a nap about every three hours.

He has a morning bottle around 7ish, oatmeal with fruit at 11ish, another bottle around 2-3ish, whatever we're having for dinner around 6ish, and then bedtime bottle around 9ish. He is a great eater, and other than some fruits will eat just about anything you put in front of him. He is starting to get the hang of self feeding too. What a big boy.

His grandparents got him a swing for the swingset in our backyard which he loves. He's adjusted to his new house very well.

He weighed in at 23.7 lbs and 29 inches long. He's starting to drop in percentile, but not in comments from everyone he meets about what a huge baby he is.

Jarrod and I always talk about how we can't believe how blessed we are to have him - and not only is he the cutest thing on the face of the universe - but he's such a good baby.

WE LOVE YOU, LEVI!

A sad and glorious day...

2009-09-02T16:55:00.000-07:00

Today has been filled with many tears, from both me and Jarrod.

We welcomed our new little puppy into our home, and quickly realized it was not the right thing for our family, and through the magic of craigslist we gave him a new home 2 days later.

My heart is so heavy and at the same time I feel a great weight lifted off my shoulders.

When we first decided to get our house is when we decided for sure to get the little guy. Ever since then, we have imagined our life in the new house with Levi, Phoebe, and "Roscoe." He was always part of the picture and thus already a member of our family.

He was the cutest puppy you'll ever see in your whole life, as confirmed by the 50+ (not exaggerating) calls that I received about him minutes after posting the ad to find him a new home.

Lesson learned: If you have an eight month old baby, an entire house in boxes, an active real estate career, and are trying to get the school year started with a private lesson studio, bringing a needy puppy into the picture will only stress you out to the level of not even being able to see straight.

I knew the first night we had him he couldn't stay. He barks in his crate and Levi can't nap. He has to be constantly watched when outside his crate so that he can be taught not to potty inside and not to chew on cell phone chargers making it immensely difficult to chase your newly crawling (creeping really) son and feed him and change his diaper and put him down for a nap and dig through boxes and try to figure out where you packed your hairdryer, and clean the dog's throw up while making sure the other dog doesn't poop while making sure Levi doesn't pull the dog's tail and that the dog doesn't chew on Levi's toes and on and on and on and on. It also isn't great when you go to bed at 11 and get up at to put Levi's paci in at 12, the dog wakes up at 1 and you take him outside for 30 minutes and never does anything, and you go back to sleep at 1:30 and are awoken at 3 and need to put Levi's paci in, and then at 3:30 to take the dog out again, and then at 6 to give Levi a bottle, and then take a nap and then are awoken to Jehovah's witnesses who Phoebe thinks are attackers and gives her scariest growls and barks and holding your son who didn't quite get his nap out and making sure the puppy doesn't escape through the open door while trying to shed some light to these "witnesses."

PHEW.

And while I feel like I can actually get ONE thing done now that he's gone, we are sad. We are so sad. It really hurts my heart (and my bank account!!)

Teaser

2009-08-27T12:11:00.000-07:00

breathe

2009-08-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

So, I'm pretty sure I lost my fan base (ha! all three of you) by not posting in so long.

I have had a pretty rough past few weeks.

I have almost spent every minute that I've been awake the past few weeks working on the new house. We're almost done. I need to do touch up work on the cabinets and then there is one major project left (the master bedroom.)

I love how the house is turning out. It's amazing what paint and new mouldings can do. It's also amazing how much time just painting takes!!

My heart has broken a little the past few weeks. I am utterly grateful for Levi's grandparents (my in laws). They have kept Levi everyday, sometimes 12+ hours, and they have loved it. I hate leaving Levi. It breaks my heart - and I am struggling because I feel like I'm choosing to leave him. But it's only temporary, and I think it's done him a lot of good to get used to other people taking care of him, and he gets exposed to more things and more learning opportunities when he's over there. I just miss him. Miss him like crazy!

It's almost over though. We are now into the packing stage, and trying to get our belongings over to the new house. I think I would pretty much rather do anything else (including painting or painful medical procedures) than pack and move. It's so overwhelming and hard for me. And now I have Levi to either take care of while I pack - or send him away :-(

Just thought I would update. I really just come home to sleep at night. I don't think I'm going to post any pictures of the house until it's all done. Well, it won't be all done for a long time - now that we actually have time to gradually fix up a house, we're taking advantage of it. Window treatments will have to wait, bathroom remodels will have to wait, I haven't even begun to think about how I'm going to set up the practice room. Patience is a ...

I'm feelin HOT HOT HOT

2009-08-11T20:47:00.001-07:00

Well, actually right now I'm feeling rather cool, blogging in my nicely air conditioned apartment eating BLUE BELL COFFEE Ice Cream!!

But I was feeling HOT HOT HOT

Why? Because even though we've moved 19 times in 5 years (okay, 9 times in almost five years) we forgot to turn the utilities on at the house before we closed on it.

Whoops!

But, we only have a limited time to work on the house and A LOT of work to do, so we grit our teeth, stripped down to the minimal acceptable clothing in case neighbors could see in our windows and painted in an unairconditioned house with 100 degree temperatures outside.

Not exactly the most pleasant weekend ever. We got a surprising amount of work accomplished given our circumstances (no electricity, no water, 8 month old baby, etc.)

Don't you love the color we decided to paint our cabinets?

A nice country look, don't you think?

HA!! Pick yourself up off the floor, that's just the primer silly!! My favorite amenity in the kitchen: the 30 year old microwave cleverly (cleverly?) hidden in a cabinet above the stove.

The cabinet doors all lined up ready to be painted the dark rich chocolate brown.

Speaking of Chocolate brown, I completed an art project that I found in a Lowes creative ideas magazine. I just about peed in my pants when I saw it - so pretty.

Step 1. Paint your canvas that you got at JoAnne's for 50% off of $15.99 (or at least pretend like you're painting it because you forgot to get a picture of actually painting it. Don't forget your fake candid picture smile!)

2. Step 2- Align your rubber doormat that you got at Target for $19.99 on top of the canvas. The Doormat was slightly bigger than the canvas, so we taped off the outside border from the back.

Step 3. Apply your really cool $3.99 make-a-gun out of your spray paint can thingy (don't worry dad, it's not a real gun)

Step 4. Apply quick thin coats of spray paint

Step Five: Lift your doormat stencil off the canvas to reveal a BEAUTIFUL piece of art. Swoon.

Although I was originally planning on doing 4 of these, like I pictured here:

I decided on 3 because you're supposed to do things in odd numbers in design. It's a rule, I didn't make it up - but I think I might want to do 4 after all, but that would mean buying a whole 'nother can of spray paint at over $6.00 and another canvas at $8.00 so I may not. I told you we were doing this house for AS LITTLE money as possible. Including the doormat, this project only cost: $50!! And if you already had the doormat it would only cost $30!

Here they are practicing for their role in the new house:

I love them. But you wanna know what I love more:

Going on a momma baby date with the best boy on the planet to IKEA and eating momma's favorite gravy and lingonberry soaked IKEA meatballs and a free kids meal of macaroni and cheese and applesauce.

As long as I knew he was in my belly

2009-08-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

Levi has now been in the outside world for as long as I knew about him inside me. The past eight months of his life passed WAY more quickly than the eight months I spent anticipating him. I know everyone says it, and everyone feels it about their kiddo - but I just can't believe how much I love this little guy (and by little I mean giant).

He still dwarfs even two year olds!

But those little chubby cheeks and thunder thighs that have more rolls than Spring Creek Barbeque won't last for long.

Sleeping:
the little turkey is still waking me up way too much at night! He can be settled with a pacifier, so Jarrod or I drag ourselves across to his room, plug him up and then back to bed. Usually that's all it takes till about 5-6 in the morning when he wants a bottle then goes back to sleep. This past week he has been waking up like 10 times and wanting his bottle at 4am! Not good for anyone. We toy with settling him the way we know he'll go back to sleep (give him his pacifier, give him a bottle, etc.) and ignoring it. You may think this is horrible parenting but I cannot let my child just cry. I can't do it. I won't. I don't have to, I'm the momma. Even if that means this phase drags out way too long. He won't need me to do this forever and I'm ok with doing it now. The last two nights have been much better. Today and yesterday I left him unswaddled for his naptime. He didn't take very long naps, and then couldn't stay awake for very long between - so he napped much more frequently, but at least he fell asleep and stayed asleep. I think we're going to say goodbye to the miracle blanket from now on.

Eating:
He is now eating table foods with us. I just throw whatever I prepare for us in the food processor for him. He's had speghetti, smothered chicken, meat loaf, chicken cacciatore, swiss steak, tacos, and all sorts of yummy foods. He loves loves loves to eat (if you can't tell by looking at him.) I take it for granted I guess that I have such a great eater, I've heard it can be hard to have a baby who has a hard time eating. He usually has a bottle way too early in the morning, then steel cut oats for breakfast with a fruit or yogurt, then a bottle in the afternoon, then regular people dinner, and then a bottle before bed. I like this schedule.

Playing:
He LOVES to watch cars. He LOVES to watch dogs. He LOVES to watch his baby einstein videos. He LOVES his jumperoo. He LOVES the water, drinking it, swimming in it, taking a bath, watching fountains - anything that involves water. He doesn't love laying on his back or stomach. He gets super frustrated when something is out of reach - you can just see him trying to crawl but just can't figure it out.

Happy eight months, Levi. Thanks for joining our family and making us laugh all the time. You're the best little dude around!

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Nursery

2009-08-07T09:24:00.000-07:00

So I'm bummed about losing Levi's current nursery. It is so big, and has lots of cool angles and built ins and a nook. His new room is going to be a 10X11 box!! The back wall has a window perfectly centered.

I LOVE symmetry, and I want to play it up. If the closet door wasn't in the way, I would like to build some floor to ceiling built-in shelves on either side of the window with a window seat / toy box under the window, but that's not an option.

So this is what I'm brainstorming. Whether or not I'll be able to do any of it is yet to be determined, but this is what I drew out this morning on powerpoint.

Beneath the window on the left will be a frame with Chalkboard paint inside so Levi can draw on his wall! Then on the other side of the window is a mirror so he can watch his favorite thing in the world - himself!

Here are the potential problems with this room:

1. This is not to scale! This is my main problem with planning a room. I always come up with these great ideas, and then they don't fit! I already know that this picture is much larger than what is actually there, and I'm thinking maybe if I make my animal prints a 2X2 set instead of a 3X3 that may help.

2. I'm afraid of the crib blocking this feature wall and access to the mirror. The crib will be up against the wall on the right side. Because I'm a horrible judge of space I'm afraid that the crib will need to be much to close to the wall with the window to be able to do this at all.

The crib wall remain the same, with my paintings above and probably the sconces on either side. And then we'll put the changing table on the other free wall with his name above it, I think. We're going to eliminate the dresser, because we really don't use it now. We have plenty of space in the changing table for what we will need his dresser for. Ideally we would get a short dresser for him and a changing pad on top, but we'll do that whenever we have extra money just laying around - so possibly never! :-)

We'll see! I'm sure something will work out if this doesn't. Any suggestions?

The original intent

2009-08-04T14:03:00.001-07:00

When I created this blog, it was to chronicle the last "flip" we did. I took pictures and walked through just about every stage in the remodeling and selling of our last house. Hence my blog title : Doingflips

Then Levi came, and the blog focus shifted. Well, as of yesterday, we are now homeowners again!!!!!

Holy Moly and not a moment too soon!!!!!!!!!

So, this blog is going to resemble it's original intent, minus the selling part. We are keeping this one.

Oh, I'm in love.

With a house.

This house.

It's not perfect.

It's not grand.

It's not huge.

It's not even large.

It's small.

It's quaint.

It's outdated.

It's a bit ugly.

It's PERFECT!!

It has some huge flaws. So do I! The perfect house must be made... not bought. So, I will do my best to work with these flaws. The difference now is that we have ZERO money to do this with!!!

Let's see how far some creativity (and by creativity I mean doing projects that I have found on other people's blogs and in magazines), and some paint and a bit of moulding can get us.

Some pictures of the outside: The backyard and the trees are what sold us on the house:

Wanna see some ideas for the inside of the house?? Do ya?? The following are examples of my Obession with powerpoint, and my mind not being able to stop racing with ideas. I have to draw them out. And since I can't draw worth a flip, I do what I can with my powerpoint skills.

Here is what I have planned for the front living room:

Another angle of the front living room:

Our Masterbedroom.

I always have plans. They seem to never come together the way I originally thought - but it always seems to work out ok.

Stay Tuned!!!! :-)

Do any schools offer a degree in teething ring performance?

2009-08-01T10:54:00.001-07:00

So I was practicing my sax the other day while the boy was playing with his toys on the floor. I look over at him and he is blowing into his teething ring and yelling and moving his fingers. I thought it was just a funny coincidence, but my mom seems to think he really was mimicking me. This kept on for a good while, him "playing" his teething ring right along with me. So I thought I would try to get a video of it. He would stop playing his teething ring when I wasn't playing, so I tried to film with one hand and play with the other. Ignore my playing, but see if you think it looks like he's trying to do what momma is doing.

Tell me what you think? Trying to play?

Don't wake me up!

2009-07-17T19:29:00.000-07:00

Jarrod had a gig at a coffee house tonight. He played with a brass quintet in Addison. Levi wanted to hear his daddy play, so we packed up and went.

Levi was a little unsure as he had been awake for two hours longer than he usually lasts between naps and the coffee shop was small and the brass quintet was loud. He made those awful rip your heart out bottom lip curl about to cry faces several times. His eyes were red from being so sleepy and he could barely keep those cheeks up. He was on the verge of tears for a while, but was content to stare off into space as if in very deep thought.

Then break time came. Daddy came over to say hi. Levi put on his most silly, happy, nose crinkling, open mouth gaping, eyes squinting, fist tightening, smiles possible. Delirious. I can't think of a better word. Smiling all over himself in disbelief that his daddy would come over and hold him. It was one of my proudest moments watching him just eat up his daddy (I think his daddy was enjoying it too). Levi just couldn't get enough.

Then break time was over, and I put in a special request for a reasonably quiet song so that Levi could get up close to the quintet and watch his daddy play and not be blasted away. They played a piece called Perfect Love for him. It's absolutely beautiful. As I was holding my baby and watching him watch my husband play I couldn't help but tear up.

I felt like I was dreaming... you know, one of those dreams where you know you're dreaming and you don't want to wake up.

I was overwhelmed with pride. The Lord has blessed me with such an amazing partner in life. Jarrod has an incredible gift. He is more passionate and works harder than anyone that I know. I absolutely love watching him play, whether it's in a coffee shop in Addison or in the Meyerson Symphony Center playing with the world renown Dallas Symphony.

Music is a huge part of who I am - music is what brought us together. I was lucky enough to marry a phenomenal musician - and to watch him with Levi, to see the joy that they bring each other is almost more than I can bear.

Here is "Perfect Love" performed by the Dallas Symphony Brass Quintet. Listen to when Jarrod comes in, what it adds to the piece - just spectacular.

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Milestones

2009-07-16T06:03:00.000-07:00

I want to not care about them, but I can't help but compare Levi to other babies his age. When I see a six month old friend crawling, or a seven month old pulling up in his crib I feel a little twinge of worry. I feel relieved when I see a six month old who is still having trouble rolling over.

I'd love to say that it just doesn't concern me and my child is perfect. Well, it's easy for me to say the last part because it's SO true :-)

But earlier this week I came to this realization: The first six months of his life the milestones were small: holding his head upright, using his hands, focusing on an object, smiling (and some bigger ones like rolling over and sitting up of course). But now the stakes are MUCH higher. Soon he is going to be crawling, then pulling up, then walking. These aren't just milestones - these things transform my BABY into a TODDLER, and I'll tell you I am content to wait for that as long as possible.

These next few months of having a BABY are so precious, and I do not want to wish them away comparing him to others that have gotten to toddler hood sooner. It will be soon enough, and too soon when it's all over and I look back.

So no more comparing milestones (though I will tell you even though he's only rolled over the one time front to back, he rolled over TWICE back to front last night).

No more wondering when he'll be rolling all over the place, when he'll be crawling, when he'll be going from laying to sitting, when he'll go from sitting to standing, when he'll be walking. I'm going to be looking back months from now kicking myself for not spending more time savoring his time as a baby.

And in other news, here's a new picture of Phoebe's puppy:

We like the names: Roscoe, Calvin (after John Calvin), Elliot (after Willard Elliot), Frasier (thought TV names would be cute, Phoebe and Frasier). Roscoe is the only one that looks like it matches him - what do you think? What other names do you like? He will probably only make it to 5-10lbs like Phoebe (same breed, possibly even related, not sure - same breeder).

Happy Seven Months!!

2009-07-10T13:55:00.000-07:00

Levi turned a whopping seven months on the ninth! I feel like I'm doing one of these slideshows every week, he's growing up too fast! My big ole 21lb boy!

There aren't too many new milestones this month. He has been going from a sitting position to on his tummy... but then cries because he doesn't know what to do from there. Poor boy has still only rolled over the one time.

He has a very consistent sleep pattern now. I don't love it, but it could be SO much worse. He goes to bed around 9:00 every night, then like clockwork needs to be fed at 5:30am. (there are usually at least two trips into his room to put in his paci too). I give him is 5:30 bottle in the crib. He usually holds it while I lay my head on his crib. He goes immediately back to to sleep until around 8:00. He can usually only stay up one hour max and then it's a LONG nap, anywhere from 2-4 hours! (Occasionally I will take that nap with him :-)

Last month he was a fussy guy, but I figured out it was sleep deprivation. We were trying to keep him unswaddled, and he just never ever got a good nap. The boy will NOT take a nap without being swaddled - even if we don't do it for a few days. That was the problem. On his six month birthday I went cold turkey on the swaddling and he didn't get a good nap until about a week later when I started swaddling him for naps again. Perfect angel after that! He does however sleep at night without being swaddled, so I'm thankful for that.

This month brought his first illness :-( and he had pretty poor timing for getting sick too, the weekend we went down to visit my parents. He ran a fever up to 104! He was MISERABLE. I was very proud of him though, because he was such a trooper for how miserable he must have been. A trip to the urgent care and a dose of antibiotics later he's back to 100% - except for the rash. Turns out he's allergic to penicillin.

My boy has LUNGS! He has been doing his "scream" thing ALL the time. It's funny and cute at home, but when we go out in public it's a little embarrassing. I'm sure this phase won't last long though, so I'm enjoying every little scream he does.

These past seven months have FLOWN by, and as I pack up the clothes he's outgrown I both cry for the tiny guy he was and rejoice for the big boy he's becoming. I love this boy so much, and sometimes I have to pinch myself to believe this is really my life.

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

We're Expecting!!! Again!!

2009-07-08T21:24:00.000-07:00

HAHAHA!!

We're expecting a new baby PUPPY!

I couldn't resist.

Since we are getting a house, we thought we would get Phoebe a puppy. I got a baby, why shouldn't she?

I'm open to name suggestions!!! (it's a boy)

vocabulary

2009-07-02T10:04:00.001-07:00

Levi has expanded his vocabulary yet again...

He was doing this...constantly

and this:

And while his mom and dad think this a glorious noise, I'm sure that visitors and the general public will be glad that he has started doing a much more pleasant version:

This one is also pretty constant. I won't complain though, I love to hear him talking!

***Keep scrolling down for more posts from today, and I think I've got one more that I'm going to add later***

Swimming!

2009-07-02T08:57:00.000-07:00

One good thing about the unbearable Texas summer heat is SWIMMING! Levi loves swimming. It's so cute to see him actually kicking his little feet. This was his very first time swimming:

*keep scrolling down for most posts from today, and come back for more!***

Lullaby

2009-07-02T08:35:00.001-07:00

Levi loves to listen to his daddy play. He'll sit and stare just mesmorized by it.

***Keep scrolling down to see more posts from today, and come back for more***

Too Big for his Britches

2009-07-02T07:57:00.000-07:00

And his Bumbo seat...

***Playing catch up and posting a whole bunch in a row. Keep scrolling for more, and come back for more posts***

Huffing

2009-07-02T07:51:00.000-07:00

Levi's new weird thing:

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

**I am posting several in a row to catch up, so keep scrolling down for more blog posts***

The Date

2009-07-02T07:23:00.000-07:00

Jarrod and I are less than fancy. A night out for us means Taco Cabana, or if we really want to splurge, On the Border or Bangkok City. So the other night was a real treat. He's a member of Restaurants.com, and a few times a year they let you buy gift certificates for 80% off. So, we were able to purchase a $50 gift certificate for $4! You had to spend $100 to use the coupon, but we had a $50 gift card from a friend for helping them move - so a $100 meal at a fancy restaurant for $4!!!

And, being the classy folks we are, we took pictures of the food :-) (we have no shame... although Jarrod did play lookout so I could hide the camera when the wait staff was coming, so I guess we do have shame. I took the pictures quickly, and the lighting was poor, so these pictures are terrible, but you get the idea)

We had 3 (THREE!!) appetizers:

Appetizer number 1: Bruschetta al Pomodoro — Toasted slices of homemade bread topped with fresh diced tomatoes, garlic, chopped basil and mozzarella. Drizzled with extra virgin olive oil

Appetizer number 2: Ostriche al forno — Oysters baked with fresh spinach, chopped onions, and bacon bids in champagne sauce

Appetizer number 3: Gamberoni Farciti — Three jumbo prawns stuffed with fresh lump crab meat, topped with creamy sun dried tomato sauce

Stef's Entree: Vitello alla Oscar — Veal scaloppini and fresh crab meat in a light brandy cream sauce

Jarrod's Entree: Bistecca con Salsa al Forno — 12- oz rib eye, aged, marinated and grilled, served with Madeira wine and mushroom sauce, side of homemade mashed potatoes

We forgot to take pictures of the Desserts

Dessert #1: Tiramisu — Lady Finger soaked in rum and espresso layered with mascarpone cheese (which we packed up and ate at home while watching House)

Dessert #2: Crème Brulee — Vanilla custard with a caramelized sugar crust

Topped off with a killer Cappuccino.

AMAZING

**I am posting several blogs in a row to catch up, so be sure to look below for other posts

Blueberry Millet

2009-07-02T07:17:00.000-07:00

There is a direct correlation between how much Levi likes his food and how much food Levi gets on his face.

Yucky food = lots of food on the face

Good food = zero food on face (we like this one)

What do you think, is he a fan of blueberry millet? Or do you think that he, like I, thinks blueberry millet is worthless?

He takes after his momma.. it was on the back of his ears and toes and everywhere!

The Entertainer

2009-06-19T19:26:00.000-07:00

I had my bible study group over for dinner last night, and Levi was invited. He was asleep when they arrived and we were all eating when he woke up. He decided that everyone was there to see HIM. So, he proceeded to entertain us during dinner. He was making noises I had never heard him make. Weird grunting noises. I was able to capture some of it on video. It was going on for a long time before I decided to get the camera. He can't just let someone else have a conversation if he's around. He needs to make sure that he is heard, and the people are listening to HIM.

Levi has already become a moocher. Whenever he sees that I am eating or drinking something, he stares at it and opens his mouth as wide as he can. So, we've been having snack time together. I've been letting him try to pick up these little Gerber puffs on his own, but he just can't seem to make the connection that he can put them in his mouth on his own. He likes to hit them and throw them, and then open his mouth as wide as he can so that I'll put one in there. Sometimes he'll get a few in a fist and put his fist in his mouth, but he hasn't actually gotten one in his mouth yet. Notice how he purses his lips when he's concentrating. I love it. He's working so hard in this video.

He loves his feet! Listen for him saying "okay"

It's not the teeth

2009-06-16T11:12:00.000-07:00

Or alternatively titled: "where did my angel baby go?"

You all are sick of me bragging on my perfect baby, I know - about how he never fusses, or never cries, and is always perfectly content. About how if he was tired, he would happily take his pacifier and go right to sleep without any protest. About how you could use one of those terrible nose suckers on him at 3:00 in the morning and he would just smile about it. About how I could do whatever I needed to do, and leave him wherever I wanted to, and he would just lie there happy and content. Never a peep of discontentment out of this boy.

Not to worry, this post will have none of that.

I mentioned in my last post that I was hoping that his recent spells of fussiness were because of teething.

It's not the teeth.

My perfect, content as can be baby has been replaced by a just as perfect, but fussy/whiny/bordering on tantrum throwing baby.

What happened?

Now I have to learn a whole new set of parenting skills.

This is where I'm so glad I have a partner to raise him with. The other day, for the first time in his ENTIRE life, he protested when I laid him down to go to sleep for the night. There have been times where he would quietly whine for a few minutes before taking a nap, but NEVER after his nighttime bottle, and he would never down right CRY. Well, this night, he would have nothing to do with it. Jarrod and I took turns rocking him, we watched an episode of House and he finally fell asleep. The next night it was the same thing. Jarrod suggested we let him cry, and that's what we did. Thankfully I was up to my elbows in dishes and wasn't just sitting on my hands watching the red lights blaring on his monitor. It didn't take him that long to fight it and fall asleep, probably about 10 minutes.

Yesterday, he was full, dry, was not tired, but was not satisfied to lay on his activity mat and play. He started fussing for no reason at all. He wasn't happy sitting up, he wasn't happy in his jumperoo, he wasn't happy anywhere. We tried teething tablets, it's not the teeth. Finally, Jarrod put him on his activity mat and suggested that we just let him whine. He whined for a few minutes, but then started playing. Then as soon as I came into view, he started his whining again. I don't think that would happen if his teeth were bothering him. Unfortunately, it's not the teeth.

So that brings us to this morning when we took a bath. He was a happy as he could be while in the tub, but when I got him out to dry him off, I'm pretty sure he threw his first tantrum. He was crying as if I was drying him off with a Brillo pad. Sure, he was probably cold and was not having nearly as much fun as when he was playing with his links in the tub... but why the hysterics? I'm pretty sure it's not his teeth. So I continued drying him off and getting him dressed, much to his distress. Then I held him close to me in the rocking chair, and he just melted into me. While he's always been a perfect content happy angel boy, he's never been much of a cuddler. I loved it. He laid his head on me and was getting over his "ugly cry." Then my parenting instincts kicked in, and I thought I ought to put him down, now that he was calm and see if he would play.

I sat him on the floor surrounded by his favorite toys, and he cried. I let him just sit there and cry while I got ready. He would be fine for a few minutes, then he would see me and raise his arms and cry. I resisted him while I was getting ready. Then I put him in his bumbo chair and tray with some Gerber puff snacks while I ate my oatmeal. I could tell he was really tired, but he was happy to have me paying attention to him, and very happy to be eating his puff snacks.

Here is my dilemma: when do I run to his rescue and scoop him up in my arms and let him know mommy is here for him whenever he needs me, and when do I let him cry it out so he learns to be a man? This is where I'm so glad to have Jarrod for support. He can be much more objective about this kind of stuff than I can. (although, Jarrod is quite a softie! He's the one who is sure to put cheese in Phoebe's bowl every time we all walk out the door because 1. He feels so bad for leaving her 2. because the cheese will keep her occupied until we are out of earshot so he doesn't have to hear her crying for us.) Phoebe is a brat. She's a great dog, and we love her more than people should love a dog - but there is no denying that she is a brat! I don't want Levi to be a brat.

If I took one thing from the book babywise, it was that your baby should be a welcomed addition to your family, and not become the center of it. I think of that often when there is stuff that I really need to get done and Levi just has to wait. But what about those times when I'm available to rescue him and hold him when he's discontent? What do I do then? I mean how can you resist that arms up in the air boy?

This is going to be hard.

I really wish it were just the teeth.

Six months!

2009-06-12T17:25:00.000-07:00

Whoa! My little boy is six months old already. He had an amazing month of discoveries. This month he mastered sitting up all by himself. He was sitting on his own briefly since around 4 months (I think), but now I can actually leave him sitting while I run into the other room for a minute.

At his doctors appointment, he weighed in at 19.13lbs, which puts him in the 85% (down from 95% in previous months). He measured 28 inches long, 95% (which is up from 90%). So I guess my huge cheeks boy is leaning out.

He has rolled over ONE time. He did that pretty close to the six month mark, but has not done it since. I give him ample opportunity, but he just doesn't want to. The doctor said that he has all the physical ability to, and that he's right on target, he just doesn't want to roll over. I don't blame him :-). That gives mommy a little bit more time with a stationary baby, which I hear is much easier to take care of.

It's getting more frustrating to make these slide shows, because unlike when he was a newborn, I can't seem to capture his personality on "film" anymore. When he was a newborn all he did was lay there and be cute - all easily documented. Now he has such a big personality which is impossible to get across with stills and short videos.

He thinks loud noises are hilarious, especially dogs barking. He loves watching his daddy play the tuba. He loves playing with his feet, and making raspberries. He LOVES LOVES LOVES his jumperoo and really enjoys baby Einstein. He prefers veggies to fruits, but will eat anything happily. So far he has had rice cereal, oatmeal, squash, sweet potato, green beans, carrots, apples, bananas, nectarines, and pears. Squash is his favorite and nectarines are his least favorite.

He is still a good baby, and if I had posted this on time, I would have said he was still a PERFECT baby. Not that he's not perfect, but the past few days he has actually been fussy. He has fussed more in the past three days than in his whole life combined. I hope he's getting teeth and that this isn't just a new thing from here on out.

Enjoy a few of my favorite moments from his sixth month:

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Since we are at the halfway mark to his first birthday, I thought I would repost all of his other slideshows as well:

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Show us where you live - Nursery Edition

2009-05-28T22:06:00.001-07:00

I like to read blogs. I don't read many stranger's blogs (anymore), but if they have a baby around Levi's age, I tune in every once in a while. This blog hosts "Show us where you live Friday," where you can link to pictures of different parts of your home. This is the sort of thing I LOVE. I love seeing how people live, and how they decorate. I LOVE decorating and making a space as pretty as possible with my limited resources. It's been sad, though, because I haven't really been able to post anything for Show us where you live Friday, because the only room I've paid special attention to in this apartment is Levi's nursery. I am proud of it, though... so I wanted to participate this Friday. I know I've posted these before.

We let him have the master bedroom, isn't that pitiful?? I knew this place was temporary, and I really wanted a space that I could make beautiful for him (well... for me to be honest). The architecture in that room was so much more interesting, and I knew that was where we would be spending most of our time anyway. (Little did I know at the time that he would sleep in our room till he was 5 months old!)

Here is the room for the doorway:

This alcove is the main reason that I wanted this room to be Levi's nursery. It's just a cozy little area for story time, and rocking, and of course - changing the diaper!

Here is the close up of the animal prints above the rocker. I found these cute prints online, and changed the background color in powerpoint on all of them so they would look like a set. I added the stripe mat background (at the time I made them, I thought I was going to have square frames, not rectangular - so they don't look as I envisioned them - but these were the cheapest frames I could find. They were $1.99 each at IKEA, and I (and by "I" I mean Jarrods brother) spray painted them black to match the room.

Here is a close up of the blanket that is over the rocker. I made this for him while pregnant. I'm sure you remember the THOUSANDS of patterns I tried before I finally combined a few I liked to come up with this one. I want to make another one, I love this blanket so much! And of course, Phoebe can't resist getting in front of the camera!

Here is Levi laying on the blanket. I don't know why this picture is all squished. He is 17 days old in this picture.

I put his name over the dresser. I never really liked the idea of letters spelling out the name in the nursery - I think because EVERYONE does it. But his name has so much significance, and I really liked these letters I found a Kohls for only $5 each! The shelves are special too because every item on these shelves are gifts from family or friends to Levi - some even home made.

I didn't try to, but a lot of his stuff has stars. I love his sheets, and the mobile matches perfectly. My dad got him a perfect blue and brown star blanket before he even know about the stars in his crib area.

I especially love how the star sheets look in this picture (although I don't know why this picture looks squished when I post it...)

Here is a close up of the paintings I did over his crib. I used the wall color as the base on canvas (although after i did it I thought I would have rather painted them brown or left them white as the base color. I ended up adding a brown border and it made it look so much better. (I did these with a stencil of course, I do not have a talent or love for painting!!)

This is probably the most special item in his nursery. That chair that he's sitting on was made by his Grandaddy (Jarrods dad.) He was putting the finishing touches on it while we were in the hospital. It is AMAZING, the picture doesn't do it justice. It is strong and shiny, rustic and polished. He didn't have a "pattern" (I know this isn't the right word, it's not a sewing project). He just got his 2X2s (I think), and figured out how to align them to form a chair. I could easily see this chair in fancy children's boutiques - and it was hand crafted with hours of labor and love especially for him. (Sorry for the yet again squished pic)

Here are all three of my favorite parts of the nursery: The Chair, the blanket, and of course, the baby!!

I'm SO outta here!

2009-05-15T11:37:00.000-07:00

This weekend is the wildflower live music festival - right outside our window. We had to sign a waiver when we moved in aknowledging that it was happening so that we wouldn't complain, I guess. There are tons and tons of live bands (the only one I recognized was the Toadies) that are going to play on this outdoor stage by the Eisemann right across the street. They have all these street vendors set up right outside our window - and I heard that sound check yesterday in my living room, and it was LOUD! I'm SO SO SO glad that the women's retreat at my church lined up with this event. I will be OUT OF HERE!! I have a feeling that the festivities out there are going to go on well past Levi's 9:00 bedtime, and I don't think that everyone will be quiet if I go down there in my pj's and ask politely for them to keep it down. These pictures were taken holding the camera outside of Levi's window:

I didn't think I'd be able to go to the retreat, because I wasn't thrilled about the idea of leaving Levi all weekend - but the retreat is very close to my Grandpa's house. So, my WONDERFUL mother is coming to my Grandpa's for the weekend to take care of Levi during the day, and I'll come back and sleep over at my Grandpa's with my baby boy! How perfect is that?! I'm nervous about being away from him for so long, I think the longest I've been away from him is 4 hours, and I'll be gone probably 12 or more on Saturday! I'm really looking forward to it though - I really need this. I don't feel like a part of my church anymore, and I don't feel like I have ANY social life at all outside of Levi, Jarrod and Phoebe. More importantly, I'm looking forward to a refreshing time seeking and worshipping God. Motherhood has taken a toll on all of my relationships, including the most important relationship I have - with my heavenly Father. I am looking forward to being focused on Him for an entire weekend, while having fellowship with the ladies that I feel so out of touch with lately.

Oh, and Levi's five month status is up. I posted two in a row, so don't miss it right below, although it's pretty long and boring, because I want to remember all the details.

My five month old boy

2009-05-15T11:11:00.000-07:00

So, this month has been the most fun so far! I do every once in a while look at the sleeper he wore in the hospital and feel a little sentimental for my tiny tiny baby, but he's been such a blast lately.

He is "talking" a lot more now. He's added some words to his vocabulary like "ga" and "da" and "mmm" and "th" (that one is accompanied by a lot of spit). Every morning he wakes up just talking and talking. I've never been great at waking up in the mornings, and it's still bad. I hear my little man start talking around 7:30, and he's just happy and talking, and I finally feel bad after about 30-45 minutes and go in there and get him up.

He's been sleeping in his crib this month!!! I know, I know... we just couldn't part with him before. I've been experimenting with leaving him unswaddled during the night. The first few nights went really well. We started to have him unswaddled in our bedroom in his co-sleeper and he did pretty well. Then we realized that if he's not bundled up tightly and he's free to move around, that he is much too big for the co-sleeper - so after getting him used to sleeping unswaddled we graduated him to his crib :-(. The first two nights he slept the whole night unswaddled, but then the next few nights he was restless and couldn't sleep. We've been back to swaddling since then. I don't know when he'll be ready for sleeping without his blanket, but I just don't see the problem with it. He likes to be bundled and cozy when he sleeps. If anyone sees a problem that I don't, let me know.

He sleeps pretty consistently about 8 hours. Very rarely he'll do a 6 hour night and then also as rarely he'll do a 10+ hour night. He usually goes to bed around 8:30-9:00 and wakes up around 4-5 in the morning. I bring him in our room to nurse him, and then I put him in the co-sleeper until around 7-9 when we get up for the day. He's really restless that first hour (after his 5 oclock feeding) going back to sleep and needs his paci to fall asleep. But then, he keeps dropping it. I counted the other night, and he dropped it 7 times in 45 minutes! Then eventually he'll drop it and not care. I'm just hoping that his 8 hour sleeps will stretch to 10-12 hour sleeps so that we can lose that final feeding, and paci fight. The other night, he woke up at 3:00am (after I had gone to bed at 1:45), and would drop his paci and wine every few minutes until around 7 in the morning when I finally gave up and just got him up for the day. Last night was perfect though. He woke up at around 4, but instead of me feeding him, I just put his pacifier in and he went back to sleep until 7:00, gave him his paci again, then awoke to a jabbering boy around 7:30. So hopefully that will become the new routine. (sorry for all the detail, this is just a great way for me to document and remember things - I know the general public is not interested in how many times he drops his paci during the night).

One day he took a four hour nap (two is usually his max, and that's rare). When he woke up from that four hour nap, he was a brand new boy. He had learned some more words, he had discovered his tongue and was making funny faces, he was actually raising up on his elbows during tummy time (when before he would occasionally raise his head briefly), he was grabbing stuff out of my hands (when before he would only grab something if you put it in his hand). I don't know what happened during that nap, but he really did wake up with all these new tricks. Bizarre.

So far, he's had rice cereal, squash, green beans, and apples. Surprisingly, apples are his least favorite. He is a HUGE fan of eating, as you've seen in his videos. We just can't get the bites in his mouth fast enough. Nursing has totally picked back up. I only give him a bottle at night now (and I nurse him). I feel like he's getting plenty to eat, and that makes me so happy.

He hasn't rolled over yet, but that's just fine. His daddy didn't roll over till he was 5 and a half months old, so he has about a week until he's behind daddy. I'm in no hurry for him to roll over though, because once they do that, then the roll over the other way, then the crawl... and I have a feeling motherhood will become a lot harder once he's mobile. I'm enjoying him a lot now when he stays right where I put him!

5 months old!

2009-05-09T20:52:00.000-07:00

Five month letter / summary to come soon.

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My Squash lovin' boy

2009-05-05T20:34:00.000-07:00

Hkatenkwan

2009-05-03T14:46:00.000-07:00

When I was probably somewhere between the ages of 5-7 I went to a Girl Scount event. I don't remember a single thing about this event except there was food from different parts of the world at different tables. One of the stations had something from a country in Africa. It was served in one of those paper condiment cups, you know like you get your ketchup in if you dine in at a fast food place? I can still taste the paper... because after I ate whatever it was, I licked and licked and licked and licked that paper cup until I was sure that I could only taste the paper. (Those of you who know me will not find this surprising at all). It was the best thing in the world. It had a peanut flavor, that's all I know. To this day, I often think about what was in that cup. I want more of it.

A blog that I frequent has a section of recipes on it, and as I was skimming through, one caught my eye:

Hkatenkwan, I have no idea how to pronounce this... in fact, my brain doesn't even try. When I see that word, my brain just skips to the next word. The next word would be Groundnut Stew, which is the English translation of Hkatenkwan.

I decided to try the recipe last night, hoping that it would taste similar to that heavenly peanuty sample I had over 20 year ago.

I was beyond thrilled at the result. Of course, I don't remember what the Girl Scout thing tasted like exactly - but this recipe tasted exactly how I wanted it to. I also licked the plate last night until every last bit was gone - no, I never grew out of that.

If you like to try new recipes, or if you like to eat good food, I can't recommend trying this enough!

Hkatenkwan (Ground Nut Stew)

Ingredients:

Cooked chicken cut into bite sized pieces (I used two large bone-in breasts)

1 Yam (diced)

1 Yellow onion (diced)

2 cups chicken broth

1 can condensed tomato soup
1 tsp ginger
1 tsp cumin

1 tsp garlic powder

1 tsp onion powder

3/4 cup Peanut butter

1 cup brown rice

(optional: Fresh Cilantro, Black eyed peas, and a banana)

Preparation:

Sautee the yam and onion, set aside

Cook and cut the chicken, set aside

Combine tomato soup, chicken broth, ginger, cumin, garlic powder, onion powder, and peanut butter (and black eyed peas if you like them, which I don't). Whisk over a medium heat.

Add in the yam, onion, and chicken, and serve over brown rice.

Top with fresh cilantro (the recipe called for seving it with fresh sliced bananas on top, also which I don't like)

I sauteed my yam and onion in hot oil with fresh garlic and only turned them a few times, so I got them nice and charred. I also spiced up my chicken with fresh garlic, pepper, and season salt and cooked it in hot oil to get it a nice golden brown, then baked it in the oven until it was done.

FABULOUS!!!

If you try this recipe (which everyone should), let me know what you think!!

Also, if you have any recipes that you like - PLEASE SHARE THEM WITH ME!! I love trying new recipes.

And for you grandparents, I couldn't leave a post without some sort of mention or picture of Levi. So, I'll tell you that Levi loved his squash last night as much as I loved my African stew. Jarrod could not shovel it in his mouth fast enough to suit him. I think he's sort of like his momma in that regard. I'm sure if I let him have the bowl, he would have licked that clean too!

And here is a picture Jarrod took while Levi and I were both enthralled with American Idol

Belly

2009-05-01T09:12:00.000-07:00

So lately, my biggest concern with Levi is what is going into his belly.

Ever since I realized that my milk supply was dwindling, I've been trying to figure out how to hold on to nursing for as long as I can. I've been trying to find a balance between nursing, pumping, supplementing, etc.

I knew that I was not producing enough to satisfy Levi. I figured the best course of action was to pump frequently, that way I knew exactly how much milk I was producing, and then supplement that with some formula so that I knew that Levi was getting plenty to eat.

After a while of doing this, I am seeing no increase in production and I'm afraid Levi has gotten used to the bottle.

I spoke with La Leche League, who informed me that pumping is not always an indicator of how much milk you are producing, since the pump does not have the same hormonal effect as the baby does. She told me to stop pumping, and to stop giving him bottles.

Yesterday I was able to not give him any bottles. I gave him rice cereal at lunch time and squash at dinner time (more about this below), and I think that helped keep him satisfied. I did give him a nighttime bottle so that I knew he had plenty in his tummy for a full eight hour night. His lunchtime feeding today, however, he was not patient with nursing, refused his rice cereal and I had to give him forumla :-(

The American Academy of Pediatricians recommends nursing for a full year, and no less than six months. The fact that he's not getting the amount of breastmilk he should breaks my heart. Not only is it a special bond between us - something that no one else can provide him - our special time together - but the health benefits that he is losing hurts too. Breastmilk is the best possible source of nutrition for my little one, it's God's perfect food for him. Breastmilk contains just the right amount of fatty acids, lactose, water, and amino acids for digestion, brain development, and growth. Breast-fed babies have lower rates of hospital admissions, ear infections, diarrhea, rashes, allergies, and other medical problems than bottle-fed babies. So it's very sad for me when I have to feed him a bottle.

To cheer me up about what's going into my baby's belly, I have decided to make all of his food. I thought it would be way harder than it actually was! I'm even making his rice cereal from scratch. I've never been really big on nutrition - but when it comes to what goes in my baby's belly, that all changed. I was surprised after reading about the health benefits of fresh homemade food vs. store bought commercially processed food.

It was super easy to make his food too. I made squash, sweet potatoes, and green beans. I baked the squash and sweet potato then pureed it with a little bit of formula. The most time consuming part about that was filling up the ice cube trays with the food. The green beans took a little more time, because after they were steamed and pureed, Jarrod had to mash them through a strainer. But even that took less than five minutes. With very minimal effort, Levi now has between 3-6 weeks of food now in the freezer.

Not only is it easy to make his food, and SO much more healthy, but it's way more cost effective as well!

Green beans, for example: I purchased about a pound of fresh organic green beans for $.66, and it filled up a whole ice cube tray. A $.45 jar of green beans fills up two holes in the ice cube tray, meaning that the whole ice cube tray of the store bought green beans would cost $3.15 instead of $.66!!! For just a little bit more effort (an no more effort than I spend on myself on a meal), you can have way more nutrious, way less expensive baby food!

I'm still working on perfecting my rice cereal. I've made one really good batch, and two not so good batches. It's not hard, I just have to figure out the right balance of formula - rice combination.

Feeding him fresh food made with my own two hands feels really good, and it makes me feel a little better about our nursing issues.

Sweet Potatoes:

3-6 weeks supply of baby food for less than $3.00!

Let's see what Levi thinks of the squash:

He kept opening his mouth really wide after he was done with a bite. He's never done that before. He also kept the majority of it in his mouth. Usually, his rice cereal ends up ALL over his face. I guess he liked the squash enough to keep it all in his mouth:

Did you really read this whole blog? Sorry for the length, I just want to remember everything.

KISSES!!!

2009-04-26T18:10:00.000-07:00

I am a lucky momma!

Big Trouble

2009-04-25T15:53:00.001-07:00

I was using the computer in our office, and Jarrod called me into the living room.

This is what I found:

The damage had already been done... so I had to take pictures.

Don't worry, it was just a little taste, even though from the picture it looks like he devoured the whole thing.

And you thought I only had one child! I think I'm in for a lot of Daddy and son making momma crazy time in the very near future.

Routine...help!

2009-04-23T19:25:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer:
this post is not meant to be a "complaining" post. I am more than thrilled with the circumstances of my life, and my roles... I'm just trying to figure out how to fulfill those roles effectively.

I have to have routine. If I don't have a schedule, I feel like I don't have control over anything. I become a mess and can't keep up with anything - housework, playing with Levi, working, other commitments.

As I type this, Levi is taking a nap (at 9:30 at night!), my house is a disaster area, I have clients who are waiting on stuff from me, I've had to say no to doing some stuff for the women's ministry at church.

Yesterday, I had to take Levi to the doctor in the middle of the afternoon, prepare to take a client out the next day, create sign up sheets, a poster, and flyers for church, as well as prepare a menu for my mother in law's dessert business - all to be done that night! (all of those things I volunteered for, and I was excited and more than thrilled to do them). I stayed up until 2 in the morning and had to be up the next day at 7 to meet a client. I had emails waiting in my inbox from people who want me to help them find apartments that I hadn't gotten back to. My house was a mess, and we had no food in the fridge. We are running out of clean clothes, and our dryer is full of a load I put in almost a week ago and still haven't put up. I'm going to have to rewash them and put them in the dryer... and they'll probably stay there for another few days and have to start the process over again. In these conditions, I freeze. I don't know what to do, and I end up doing nothing. I told my friend I would not be able to create the poster and flyers for church, and Jarrod cooked dinner. That was a huge help.

Why am I writing this blog instead of doing the 1,000,000 things I have on my plate? Because I don't know where to start. I don't know when baby boy is going to wake up from his nap, and I don't want to get elbow deep in washing his bottles when he's going to need me.

I feel overwhelmed all the time

I feel like I have 100 things to do every day, and I can only get 10 of them done.

I feel like I can't give 100% of myself to anything

I feel like I'm letting everyone around me down

I have realized that I can never accomplish everything that I want to accomplish in one day, but I'm not okay with that (yet)

I don't know how to work from home, care for my son, and keep a nice house.

As hard as I try every day, I cannot get Levi on a routine. I try to be consistent with feedings, naps, amount of playtime, etc. but he just won't cooperate. He's not fussy about it - he just is so inconsistent with the amount of sleep he needs and when.

He never asks to eat. He never fusses, so it's hard to tell when he needs anything. I can tell when he's tired because he rubs his eyes and yawns and sometimes fusses - but even if he acts like he's as tired as possible, sometimes he'll go to sleep for 20 minutes and then be WIDE awake and smiley. I've tried just keeping him in bed for at least an hour each time he goes down for a nap, but I just can't walk out of the room when he doesn't seem tired in the least, and he's as happy as can be.

Sometimes he eats a 6oz bottle and doesn't seem satisfied. Sometimes he'll refuse to eat altogether.

How can I plan for my day and get anything done when I have no idea what to expect? How can I call a client when I put Levi down for a nap, when he could wake up at any moment?

Help...

And now, he's taking a nap at 9:30 - and his bed time is around 10?!?! How does that work?

Help...

It's not so much a problem of the amount of things that I have to do... the problem is my approach. There are enough hours in the day... I just don't know how to manage my time, especially when I'm not the one in charge of my time anymore.

I don't know how people with multiple children do it...

Help... seriously. Any advice is gladly welcomed!

The Tank

2009-04-22T14:44:00.000-07:00

As my brother Aaron and his wife, April, refer to Levi as.

At his doctors appointment, he weighed in at 18lbs (95%)
He is 26 inches tall (93%)
and has a perfect shaped head.

Good job, Levi, you're already getting A's.

Before I had Levi, I would read people's stats on their babies and wonder who really cared how big their babies head is. Now, I think the whole world needs to know exactly what Levi's measurements are.

Funny how motherhood changes everything.

One Year Ago Today

2009-04-20T20:24:00.000-07:00

So, today is my best friends birthday. She turned 27. April 20th is also the day last year that I found out that I was pregnant.

Had I known then what I know now, I would have cried a little more when I found out. Jennifer met me at Starbucks on her birthday, and I shared the news with her. She jumped and wept and laughed. I stared off into space and wondered what I had gotten myself into. She exactly knew what I was getting into. She had a beautiful little girl at home, sleeping (I would say like an angel, but I know her better than that. She was probably up playing with her toys when she was supposed to be asleep :-)

I jump and weep and laugh a little bit every day now. I cannot believe how much joy came into this world with Levi. I just had to wait until December, until I met him, to really understand it.

Easter Weekend

2009-04-15T08:03:00.000-07:00

We had a jam packed fun filled Easter weekend. First, my Grandpa turned 90 years old! We had a party for him at the American Legion down in Gun Barrel City.

It was a fun day because he got to play with his Granny and Grandpa, his Aunt April and Uncle Aaron, and his cousin Michael.

My mom is pretty happy getting to hold both of her grandkids at the same time:

Michael and Levi played together as well as a four month and nine month old could. Michael thought Levi was an interesting toy, and went straight for his eyes. Michael is now all over the place, crawling and pulling up! What a big boy. It's fun to see him, and think about what stages are coming up in little Levi's life. I need to take advantage of Levi's non mobility while I can!

On Easter morning, Jarrod had a gig at another church, so Levi and I went alone to our church. On the drive to church, I turned down off the radio, and explained to Levi who God is, who Jesus is, what Jesus did for us, and why we celebrate Easter. Have you ever delivered the gospel message to a baby / small child, who doesn't know about God? It was harder than I thought it would be. I had to establish who God is, then why there needed to be a Savior, then tell him about the sacrifice that Jesus made, and the hope we now have in Him. That's hard to explain on such an elementary level. It actually gave me a new perspective on the gospel. I told him that I hope that one day he would invite Jesus to live inside of his heart so that he could be made clean enough to enter into the presence of our Holy God and live forever in Heaven. I'm not sure it all sunk in :-), but he was kicking his feet and smiling and enjoying the sound of my voice none the less.

Then that afternoon, Jarrod had his annual Easter concert with the Dallas Symphony. They usually play out at Lee park in Oak Lawn, but this year (and last year) the weather had them move into the Meyerson. I thought this would be a good opportunity for Levi to hear his Daddy play with the symphony, since it was a casual free concert. I was wrong. He was way too talkative, and mommy and baby enjoyed the concert from the lobby.

Here is Levi and Daddy just before the concert:

Phew! That was a long fun weekend. I think I'll take a nap with my easter duck.

Four Months Old

2009-04-09T06:56:00.000-07:00

Dear Levi,

Today you turn four months old! You are getting stronger and smarter every day. Your cheeks get a little bigger every day too, the first thing that people say when they meet you for the first time is "what are you feeding that kid?"

We have started to see some more of your personally coming out, and I think you're going to be an independent boy. Up to this point in your life, you hardly ever fussed and never cried. That has changed a little bit. You are more particular about where you want to be, and what you want to play with. You have realized that you have an opinion and that you can voice it to get what you want. I like that. I was worried that you would be a pushover, because of how gentle and quiet you were all the time.

You love to be rocked to sleep, but when it's time to play, you don't want to be held. In fact, you don't even want to lie down. You want to either be sitting or standing. You're pretty good at sitting on your own for a minute or so at a time. Your favorite thing to do is still sit or stand in front of the mirror.

You have also learned to use your hands much better. You can suck on your fingers, you can grab for interesting objects, and you can put those things in your mouth.

You still don't do a great job of lifting your head up when you're on our tummy, but we're not worried about that since you can almost sit by yourself. You'll put your head up when you feel like it, and that's just fine be me.

You have a favorite toy: your caterpillar. You love to suck on it's feet, and your eyes light up when I bring it to you.

You got a haircut this month. Actually, you got two. The first one by your daddy, not a great one - then the second by your grandma - much better. Now that I look at pictures of your pre-haircut, I realize that we should have done it much much sooner. You were a shaggy little guy.

You have started rice cereal, which has been fun. You like to eat with the spoon, although you get tired of it pretty quickly. Now that I've been adding some formula and rice cereal to your bottle, you're not waking up hungry every four hours anymore. You've been consistently sleeping through the night, and you slept almost ten hours last night!! I'm so proud of you!

Your daddy and I LOVE to watch you when we put you down to go to sleep. I guess because your tummy is so full, you are just SO happy. You smile all over your whole face and we can't get enough of it.

While you have become more opinionated this month, you are still such a good baby. Sometimes I can't get over how blessed we are that God gave you to us. You bring an indescribable joy to our family, and I will work my whole life trying to make you know how much I love you, and try to return a little of that joy to you. Thank God for you, my big big baby boy.

Love,
Your Proud Momma

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

FEED ME!

2009-04-04T08:19:00.000-07:00

So, I gave in and gave our little guy something with some substance. I really wanted to wait as long as possible before supplementing his food in any way... with solids or formula.

Remember my clinically large baby in the womb? Well, I don't know if you would call it clinically large, but he's a "tank" as my older brother referred to him. I've never known of another baby to weigh as much as him at his age. At his two month appointment he was 16.5 lbs (95%), and according to the scale in our bathroom I am 18 lbs heavier when I'm holding him.

Lately, he just hasn't been happy when I'm nursing him. He eats for a minute and then starts crying, then I switch sides and he's fine again for a minute and then starts crying again. I attributed this to teething pain... but I now I think that he's just not getting enough to eat.

I have pumped a few times at the same time he would have eaten, and I've only gotten 3oz. Now, I'm not sure how much a baby his age / weight is supposed to get, but I think that a 4 month old 18 pound baby should be getting more than 3oz of milk before bed. This would explain why he's back to his newborn habit of waking up every 3-4 hours to eat.

So, we decided to start him on Rice cereal!!! On one hand I was super excited about this, and on the other I was terribly disappointed. I wanted to wait six months... but as his mom, I just felt like he needed something more.

Last night when I pumped his bedtime bottle so that I could add a little rice cereal (and this is when I discovered that I only produced 3 oz.) Begrudgingly, I added some formula to it and some rice cereal, for a total of 6 oz and a little over a tablespoon of rice cereal. He chugged it! When I took it away to burp him, he cried like he does when I'm nursing him. My poor baby has been hungry... so sad. He finished every last drop of that bottle, and didn't seem satisfied still, so we have him another ounce of formula. I laid him down in his bed and he was ALL smiles. Lately, after he eats he is not a happy camper (now I know why), but he just wouldn't stop looking at me and smiling SO big. This lasted for a few minutes. I think he was just so happy to be full. While I wasn't thrilled about not being able to satisfy my baby's hunger alone, I was so happy to see him so satisfied.

Spoon feeding him rice cereal was fun. He did VERY well, most of it actually did make it in his belly to my surprise. We still did need a bath afterward though!

He ended the session looking like this:

Hey Jennifer!

2009-03-30T20:38:00.000-07:00

You left something over at my place:

Guess we'll have to get together soon :-)

I usually don't post two days in a row, so make sure you don't miss the haircut post below

Some things are better left to the professionals...

2009-03-29T19:58:00.000-07:00

So you would think I would have learned my lesson after these two disasters:

1. Number 4. on this blog post

2.

But no, I went ahead and let this happen:

Good thing Grandma went to Beauty school and could help us remedy the situation

His hair was way too wild. It was time. His haircut is nice, although it does look like he's about to go to Marine boot camp :-)

Jabber boy and Website

2009-03-25T05:54:00.000-07:00

This may be boring to some, I don't know, because of how long the videos are. I got home from bible study last night, and Jarrod could not wait to show me these videos he took.

So he put little man down for a nap, and heard some jabbering on the monitor. He went into see him, and had a very long conversation with him. Then realized he wasn't tired and got him out, and continued this long conversation in the living room.

I can't believe I missed it. This is as talkative as he's ever been. I love it!

I posted them in order, but the second one is way better than the first.

Also, if you get a minute, go over to the website I built and look for mistakes. Also look for anything that might be confusing or hard to follow. I would love any constructive criticism or suggestions. You can email it to StephanieLRobertson@gmail.com. www.DallasEventMusic.com

One of us is not quite ready

2009-03-23T09:36:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday at church during one of the worship songs, I decided I would take Levi back to the nursery. I went back to the sound area where Jarrod was doing the slides for the songs and asked him what he thought. He said if I'm okay with it, he's okay with it. Levi is a good boy at church... but I'm so worried about him making a peep, I usually can't pay attention. Or I need to leave to change him, etc.

I have never left him with anyone but a grandparent. Even then, it's in his environment.

So, I took him back to the nursery, explained his whole life story to the three adults in the room. Told them he couldn't sit up on his own yet, so he would need to be held, or on a pallet in the floor. I went ahead and made up a pallet on the floor for him and reluctantly left. I took a pager with me and told them even if he is only a little fussy to go ahead and page me.

I went back to the sanctuary in time for one more worship song, and then the sermon. I told myself that everything was fine... if he gets fussy they'll call. If I really wanted to, I could go check on him too. I decided to wait a few minutes before I checked on him. I kept looking at my pager. I wasn't sure if it lit up, or vibrated, or both, or what. I put it on my legs in case it vibrated, and I put it where I could see it in case it lit up. I sat there nervously and was so proud because I made it through the entire sermon. I decided when our pastor closed with prayer that I would slip out and go back there. I would miss the benediction, some scripture, the invitation, etc... but I figured I had tormented myself long enough.

As I got up and headed to the doors in the back of the sanctuary, guess what I saw? Jarrod holding my little sleeping boy! I asked him how long he had been in there, and he said he got him out of the nursery as soon as worship was over! There I was in church being so proud of myself for leaving him in there, while my baby boy was asleep four rows back! Turns out he was in the nursery for probably all of five minutes.

I guess Jarrod's not quite ready for his baby boy to go to the nursery.

My baby story

2009-03-21T12:18:00.001-07:00

This may not be appropriate to share with the world, and I apologize if this is too much information for some... but a friend of mine's blog encouraged me to tell my story. She is at a season in her life when there are babies being welcomed into the world all around her. Her situation has her struggling with how, when, or even if she will conceive a child.

I understand her pain and wondering. I am sharing this because I do not know who all reads my blog. I am surprised to find new readers all the time. Someone could be in similar circumstances, and I want to encourage them with my story.

Ever since I was old enough to know that I could have kids of my own one day, that has been my ultimate goal in life - to be a mommy. I think my love of children grew even more when my mother had her third baby when I was 10 years old. I loved my little baby brother so much (well, of course I still do). As soon as I was old enough, I applied to work at a day care with babies. I worked at day cares during summers when I was in college, and nannied during the school year. I even nannied a little girl while I was doing a semester in Paris. I could not wait to have a baby of my own - not just a baby though, a family.

As I've shared before on my blog, when I found out how my then boyfriend was with kids, I was done looking for a suitable father for my children. He was it. I married him after four years of dating. We both looked forward to the day when we could expand our family. We wanted it to be done right though. We didn't want to rush into having children. We wanted a rock solid foundation in our marriage, and a little extra wiggle room in our bank accounts before we welcomed any little ones.

Here's the part that may be too much information for some. My body doesn't function properly. I did not have periods unless I was on a form of birth control, and even then they weren't regular. I knew it would likely be a long arduous road to conception. After prayerful consideration and talks together with Jarrod, we decided that we would stop preventing a pregnancy. We figured it was not likely at all that I would get pregnant without medical intervention, if even at all. We decided that if we miraculously did get pregnant, that we would be thrilled and accept that as the Lord's timing. In reality, though, I knew that the chances were slim to none. My motivation for not preventing pregnancy was that if enough years passed without a pregnancy, Jarrod and I would already know that we needed medical intervention or to consider adoption. I didn't want to wait to try till we were ready, then try for years only to then have to go through years of treatments, or an adoption process.

Years did pass. Though we were never quite ready to start figuring out a solution, the fact that I was not getting pregnant was always in the back of my mind. Every time a new person announced a pregnancy I was silently jealous. Every time someone brought their brand new baby to church it hurt a little. Every time someone asked us "when are you going to have kids" it hurt a little. Sometimes it hurt a lot. Sometimes I would conveniently forget about the baby showers at church, or I would "not see" the sign up sheet to bring a dinner to the new mommy. I would frequently take pregnancy tests, because I did not have the friendly reminder that I was not pregnant every month. While we never necessarily wanted a positive result (yet), I was always disappointed to see the single line on the test. Every time I took a test I got a little more hopeless.

After three years of this had passed, I did conceive naturally (obviously). It was a total shock. How could this have happened? What seemed impossible was a reality. Of course I was thrilled, and all my fears about not being able to conceive were all thrown out the window. What an unbelievable relief it was that my fear of not being able to conceive was now over! (to be followed by the fear of miscarriage, then the fear of losing him during birth, then the fear of SIDS - where I am right now).

My Heavenly Father decided to open my womb at that particular time in my life. The timing seemed bizarre to Jarrod and I, but it was what the Lord had in mind (and now I understand it... I mean have you seen Levi?).

All the time that I had spent tormenting myself about being a mom was in vain. I was so fortunate that we never had to feel the pain of trying to conceive with failure. I am so fortunate that I was able to carry a life inside of me. However, I hope that this story is an encouragement that YOU are not in control of when and how or even if you will conceive. Although that often won't be enough to stifle the pain, know that the days of your child are known to the Lord, and your child will be presented in the perfect time in the perfect manner.

I also want to encourage my readers to not ask their married friends when they will be welcoming a new addition. Either you are good enough friends with them to know their situation already, or you may be adding salt to already sore wounds without knowing it.

Tid Bits

2009-03-18T16:14:00.000-07:00

1. I think Levi might be teething. He's showing all the symptoms, and is a little moodier than usual, but isn't it too early for that?

2. He got a bumbo chair. I love it, he's not too sure about it. He has to work to sit up in it, so he gets tired of it pretty quickly

3. My birthday is coming up and Jarrod is taking me to III Forks. I am drooling as I type this.

4. Baby boy has no routine anymore. Sometimes he's hungry after only three hours, sometimes he's not even hungry after four. Sometimes he sleeps almost eight hour stretches (rare), sometimes he sleeps for only three hour stretches. Sometimes he takes two hour long naps, sometimes he takes 30 minute naps. I love knowing what my day has in store, I thrive with a detailed schedule... but he wants nothing to do with that!

5. This week has been Jarrods spring break, so he took over a lot of the baby duties while I create a website for him. It's a wedding musician booking website.

6. I LOVE being creative. I love making "pretty" things. Websites, flyers, business cards, slideshows, rooms, presentations, houses... I love it. I've really enjoyed putting this website together... I just wish I knew more about coding and the technical stuff behind it. I could make it look SO much better if I knew stuff like that.

7. My precious little Phoebe Loo is back to her old self. Ever since we brought Levi home, she has been a depressed little dog. She would mope around all day. It even got so bad at one point she even refused treats - and good treats too -People food treats! But over the past two weeks or so, she has completely perked up to her old self, and we are so happy to have her back.

8. Levi loves to fly. I've been doing "superman" with him, and he gets the biggest kick out of it. I have to watch out for spit up though.

9. Levi's favorite game is still looking in the mirror. He was crying the other day... and there has only been one or two other times when he's cried and I couldn't calm him down with at least a pacifier - - well, I tried bouncing him around, walking with him, giving him his pacifier - nothing worked. I went into the bathroom with him and put him in front of the mirror, and as soon as he caught a glimpse of himself he stopped crying and started smiling so big. Wouldn't you too if you were him?

Here are two videos of my little man:

Levi turns three months old!!!

2009-03-09T09:21:00.000-07:00

Dear Levi,

Today you turn three months old. I know it's cliche to say this... but I can't believe three months have passed since I met you, and at the same time I feel like I've known you my whole life.

Your daddy and I love to take you and Phoebe out for walks. You'll learn one day that often times life's little circumstances can cause you to miss out on the big picture. While on these family walks, life's circumstances and difficulties disappear. I'm not thinking about how much money is in our bank account, or how I am going to manage this or that. While I'm on those walks, I realize that I already have everything that I've ever wanted. I have my husband by my side, my adorable puppy dog, and you - my perfect baby boy. Nothing else in the world matters.

This month was full of new places for you. You went to visit your Grandparents in New Braunfels for the first time, you went to Longview where your Daddy got to play "An American in Paris." You went to your first pizza party with all your friends from church (which was your first time at a restaurant), you went to your first birthday party at a bowling alley. You went to your first coffee shop. You have taken your first naps in your crib. You have also made some exciting new discoveries. You have learned all about your hands, and realized that you can suck on them! You've discovered your spit and have decided that you'd much rather share it with all of us than swallow it.

You tricked us into thinking you were going to start sleeping through the night. You had three nights where you slept for almost eight hours in a row, but decided you liked it better when you were waking up during the night. You like to sleep for around six and a half hours, then you're ready for your early morning meal. Then, no matter what time your woke up last, you usually like to wake up at around 8:15. You wake us up by talking and laughing. We get you out of your co-sleeper and we play smiling games until you fall back to sleep a few minutes later.

You know what makes you smile more than anything? Your Daddy's voice! It doesn't matter what mood you're in, when you hear that deep voice saying "boy boy" your whole face lights up. He tries not to gloat about the fact that his voice gets more of a response than mine does... but I can see in his eyes that he is beyond thrilled with himself that his voice triggers so much joy inside of his little boy.

You know, Levi, you are the reason I was born. If that's all I ever accomplish, it's enough. I was born to give you life, and it is my desire that your life be filled with joy and security. Not joy in things, or in circumstances - but the joy that comes from the big picture, the eternal perspective. The knowledge of your Savior and the joy that only He can bring. I pray that he reveals himself to you through your Daddy and I, and that you will follow in your Daddy's footsteps and become a man of God.

I love you, my little guy. Don't be in a hurry to grow up, okay?

Mommy

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Longview, TX

2009-02-21T16:13:00.000-08:00

I am in a La Quinta Inn and Suites in Longview, TX. Jarrod got called to play a concert here, and so Levi and Phoebe and I decided to come along (Good thing La Quintas are pet friendly). The symphony pays for a single hotel room for Jarrod, and I like to attend all of his concerts when possible.

When I gave birth to Levi, I also lost a good portion of my brain, I think. I am having the hardest time comprehending things lately, and my memory is not at all what it used to be... but I will never forget the last time I was in Longview.

For having such a bad memory lately, I remember last time I was in Longview so vividly. I am remembering the smallest details of the last time I was here. I remember the conversation that the people sitting at the table next to us at breakfast were having. I remember what the bar tender looked like at the Chilis where we ate. I remember where we were sitting, what we were eating, and that the Mavericks game was on. I remember a guy with a laptop sitting by himself at the Chilis.

It was the weekend of April 17-19. I had been feeling a little queezy for a few days. On the ride down to Longview, I thought about the possibility of being pregnant. I, not knowing how morning sickness worked, thought about paying attention to what time of the day I felt sick to see if it was the same each day. I remember driving to the mall in Longview at around 2:00 and feeling sick. The the next day I was anxiously awaiting 2:00 hoping to feel queezy. 2:00 came and went with no sick feeling. Later that evening I felt it again. Maybe I just had a bug? I mentioned feeling a little sick to Jarrod a few times, and he never questioned it. I was hoping he wouldn't, because I really thought I could be prengnant, and if he asked me if I thought I was, my face wouldn't be able to hide what I was thinking. (I always dreamed of surprising my husband with the news.) So, this was on my mind the entire trip.

At one point in the trip, we went to a bookstore. I had just finished Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers (which if you have not read this book YOU HAVE TO!!!). I wanted to read another one of her books. I looked them all over, and read the backs of each one. Then I saw one with an illustration of a pregnant girl on the cover. I didn't even have to read the back... that's the one I got. I remember sitting in Jarrods rehearsal, reading my new book about a girl finding out she was pregnant, wondering if I was.

I ended up taking a pregnancy test in a Walmart bathroom stall when we got back into town. It was positive!

Last time I was in Longview, I was daydreaming about the possibility of having a baby. This time I'm in Longview with our beautiful son (who slept for almost eight hours last night!!!!)

I like Longview.

2 months old!!!

2009-02-10T19:29:00.000-08:00

Dear Levi,

Today you turn 2 months old. I was holding you in my lap earlier, and your hand was on my cheek. I was sitting there watching you sleeping and the phone rang. My first instinct was to get up and answer it, but I didn't. All I wanted to do was sit in that chair forever holding you and watching you sleep. I thought about what a relatively short time I have where you are small enough to sleep in my lap. I thought about what a short time I have where my lap is your very favorite place to be. And since I can't keep you my tiny baby forever, I just let the phone ring. You see, you are the very most important thing to me and I wish I could bottle up this time with you and keep it forever. I guess that's why I take so many pictures and videos of you.

This month with you has been so much fun. You started smiling on purpose!! My favorite times with you are while changing your diaper on the changing table. For some reason when you get up there, you are always all smiles and are so playful.

You are still such a good baby. You hardly ever fuss and when you do get a little fussy, there is always a reason. It's usually because you're tired and want to go to sleep. All we have to do is swaddle you up, and you fall asleep in a few minutes. You aren't quite sleeping through the night yet. The most you have slept at night is for six and a half hours. You make it very easy for me during your late night feedings though. You stir and grunt a little to let me know that you're hungry. I take you out and feed you. Halfway through, I unswaddle you, burp you, and lay you down on the bed and get ready to change your diaper. I get a wipe and clench it in my hand to get it warm, lean back and wait about one minute and you ALWAYS poo! ALWAYS!! I change your diaper, reswaddle you, feed you the rest, and you fall asleep. I hold you for just a minute and lay you down in your co-sleeper. You are always wide awake by the time your head hits the mattress. A lot of the times we look at each other until your blinks get longer and longer and you fall asleep. You These are some of my favorite moments with you - looking at each other, sometimes smiling, and falling asleep. While I look forward to getting a full nights sleep one day, I will miss that time with you.

I love you so much, Levi. I am so proud of you. Sometimes I just cannot believe how blessed I am. I love knowing you so well. I love being your mommy. I am sad another month has passed, but am thrilled that that passing month has brought smiles and spit bubbles! I know next month will bring even more joy.

I love you baby boy. You are my special gift from God, and you have given me more joy than I ever thought possible.

Love,

Your Momma

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Going for a walk!

2009-02-03T10:50:00.001-08:00

So Jarrod this week Jarrod has his normal work day, then has rehearsals or performances of the musical Annie almost every evening. This means he is gone for 12+ hours. This also means that I have to take Phoebe to do her business. I was very worried about how this was going to work, because it's been freezing outside lately. I don't want to subject my perfect baby boy to the freezing air. But my mom assured me that fresh air of any kind is good for him, and as long as he's bundled up and we're not out there too long, that he'd be fine. Luckily it was in the 40s last night when I took them out, and it was in the 50s and sunny this afternoon. Last night, I took him out in his stroller so that I could smother him with blankets. I was planning on putting him in his carseat and attaching the carseat to the stroller, but I could never figure out how to do that. In the process of trying to figure it out, I found out how to lay the seat back, so I just laid him in there and covered him up with blankets. It was an interesting affair trying to navigate a prissy little dog who has no leash manners and a giant stroller I had never used before through hallways and elevators and doors. All in all it worked out, but it was hard to force Phoebe on the grass when I couldn't really get on the grass with the stroller.

Here I am in my stroller!!

This afternoon I thought it was nice enough outside to just go in our little back pack thing. This was much easier. I was able to walk on the grass with Phoebe. It was actually really nice to get out in the fresh air and tell Levi about the clouds and the wind. We walked over by a really cool fountain, and he watched the water splashing for a while. Then he fell asleep.

Let's see, what else. We are going to my family's house in New Braunfels next weekend, and I can't wait. Levi has been practicing his smiling for his Granny and Grandpa and Uncle Punk. Phoebe will have a nice time playing with Doodle, their little shih-tzu. Phoebe has been feeling pretty neglected lately and has been moping around. We feel so bad for her.

And here are some more shots of my adorable boy:

My favorite moment so far in this life...

2009-01-28T19:58:00.000-08:00

This morning I had the best moment I've ever had. It was the most special thing I've ever experienced. I don't know if I can describe what happened in a way to give it justice, but I'll try because I want to always remember it.

This morning I was awakened to some restless sounds coming from the co-sleeper next to me. I looked at the clock and saw that I had just put him to sleep an hour earlier, so he should not be waking up yet. I was slightly annoyed. Then I looked into the co sleeper and all of that annoyance melted away into a feeling I can't describe.

He was wide awake. He was just looking around perfectly content. He saw me peering over the bed at him, we made eye contact, and he smiled at me. I smiled back at him and he responded with an even bigger wide open mouth smile. I picked him up as fast as I could, held him close, told him I loved him. Then I put him on a pillow on my lap where he fell right back to sleep. A few minutes later I returned him to his co-sleeper and we slept for another two hours.

First of all, I am just so proud of him. He is such a good baby. He wakes up from his naps or at night calmly without crying. He grunts a little, but he mostly just squirms and looks around. I remember reading in the book babywise that if you followed their technique that your baby would wake up happy and cooing instead of crying. I thought that was bologna! The book was right though. It melts my heart when I check on him during naps and he is wide awake just looking around happily. That alone would have made me happy this morning - to look into his co-sleeper and see him awake and happy. But when he smiled at me, I could not hug him fast enough. It was the first time that he smiled at me without me "coaxing" it out of him. He just saw me a smiled. My best friend said that was his first time to tell me "I love you." I didn't think about it that way at the time, but I think she's right. That's the way it felt.

I love you too, Levi.

Off to Church

2009-01-26T15:01:00.001-08:00

Look at how cute I am in my church outfit my Granny got for me!

Here I am watching Mommy get ready for church. Why is she always taking pictures of me?

My parents woke me up to go to church, then expected me to be quiet? That preacher sure is loud. Daddy, can you take me somewhere quiet and rock me back to sleep?

Here goes Mommy taking pictures again! Shouldn't you be paying attention to the sermon? It's so nice that the church has a room for me to be rocked or nursed in where you can still listen to the service... but you're just taking pictures!

Daddy is very good at rocking me. Why is mommy crying? I think it might be because she loves me so much and feels so blessed.

Oh boy, church was fun. Let's do this again next week!

***************************************************

Levi has been our little smile boy lately. We caught some of it on video yesterday. Even since we took this video yesterday he has been even more smiley - smiling when spoken to, and smiling more often. This is just so exciting to me (if you can't tell by my goofy voice and expression when Jarrod puts the camera on me). I can't describe the feeling of seeing him smile - knowing that he is happy!! It's a satisfying reminder that I'm doing an ok job, and that not only are his needs being met, but he's enjoying himself too.

6 weeks old already!!!

2009-01-21T17:11:00.000-08:00

I know he's not starting Kindergarten or anything, but I feel like my baby is growing up!!! He's turning into a little boy right before my eyes. I swear the other night he was smiling at me on purpose. He hasn't done it since, so I could be wrong. It lasted a few minutes though, me doing something funny - then he would smile, and we repeated this for probably ten minutes or so. I reached for my phone to capture these little smiles (the camera was not close.)

I love this little grin:

Big smile for Momma!

Levi has some funky hair! I already have to tuck some of it behind his ear. I'm not sure we can wait a full year before we get his hair cut. Sometimes, because we are just cruel parents, Jarrod and I like to make it stick straight up and take pictures of him :-)

Levi was hungry and hoping that maybe Daddy's nose had some dinner for him:

I don't mean to brag, but I really do have the best baby of all time. I know I say it everytime, but I just can't believe how well behaved he is. Like this morning, I had to take a bath so I swaddled him and put him in his swing next to the bathtub. He just stared at the bathtub and eventually fell asleep all on his own without a peep, without a pacifier or anything. At night lately, I've put him down after his feeding asleep, but as soon as his head hits the mattress he wakes right up. He will lay there for a few minutes and move around and grunt a little, but will fall asleep on his own.

What a random post. I guess it's better than no post at all :-)

Coming to you from Oklahoma

2009-01-16T20:50:00.000-08:00

So I'm in a Best Western in Lawton Oklahoma. I had never heard of Lawton until a few days ago. Jarrod is playing with the Lawton Philharmonic this weekend, and instead of me and Levi missing him and being home alone all weekend, we thought we'd join him. It's pretty amazing how much stuff we had to bring to be gone for such a short period of time. Our little Jetta was packed - front seat, back seats, and trunk. It's not all Levi's fault though, when you're traveling with a tuba player and his mute - space is very limited. Good thing we traded the beetle in!

So, a few nights ago, Jarrod didn't have to be anywhere in the early morning, so I thought I would ask him if he wanted to do a night time feeding since Levi was introduced to a bottle. I was SO excited. I'm getting more used to it, but it's so hard to wake up every three hours for at least 45 minutes EVERY night. I feel like I can never catch up.

I was dumb and volunteered to warm up his bottle, because I felt bad that when I get up at night, I don't actually have to get out of bed. So I thought I could warm up his bottle and crawl back into bed and go to sleep while Jarrod dealt with the feeding, burping, and diapering. WRONG!! Levi let us know he was hungry, and I got up to go prepare his bottle. By the time I got to the kitchen, his little wake up grunts turned into to cries. By the time I got the water warm enough to heat the bottle, his cries had turned to screams. This child hardly ever cries, so it breaks my heart to hear it. There I was in the kitchen while my baby is in the other room crying in hunger. I felt like such a bad mom - I was making him cry so that I could get some sleep. So by the time I gave Jarrod the bottle (which wasn't quite warm yet, but I couldn't take the crying anymore), he was gulping. I felt horrible. Once I laid down, I was the one who was crying. I was upset because he was so upset and hungry, and also because I was TOTALLY awake at this point, and there was no way I was falling back to sleep until the feeding, burping, diapering was over. So not only did I feel terrible for making him cry to gain a little sleep, but I didn't actually gain any sleep. It was nice though, to not be the one in charge. It was nice to lay there and watch knowing that I could go to sleep if I wanted to - and that if Levi decided to stay awake after he finished eating, that Jarrod would be responsible for putting him back to sleep.

I do like watching Jarrod feed Levi, and I know that he enjoys it too - but I don't like this whole giving him a bottle thing. It just seems so unnatural, and selfishly I like being his sole source of sustenance. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed nursing until I had to stand back and watch someone else feed my child (even if it was my child's father!) I think we'll stick to nursing for now as much as possible.

Since he has to grow up anyway...

2009-01-13T20:53:00.001-08:00

It breaks my heart to announce that my little Levi has officially graduated from Newborn outfits to 3 month outfits.

But, outfits like these make the transition a little more tolerable:

This one is compliments of G-money, my dad, and is SO true. This boy has ruined so many outfits because of his "dangerous" booty.

This one was a gift from Jarrods bro and girlfriend, and what he wore on his first trip to church! Jarrod got him ready for church while I got myself ready. When I first saw my little tiny baby in this outfit I almost cried. He went from looking like a newborn to a little boy! How cute is he?

Church was good, except he was supposed to sleep the whole time but decided he wanted to stay awake. He was content, but he makes these grunting sounds even when he's happy, so we hung out in the nursery.

If you missed my last post, I made a compilation of pictures and videos for his one month birthday. Scroll down a bit to see it.

Levi turns one month!

2009-01-09T20:07:00.000-08:00

Dear Levi,

Today you turned one month old. Your mommy and daddy have enjoyed getting to know you and falling in love with you. I have to admit, when the nurse came into my hospital room about 2 hours after you were born and asked if I wanted to nurse you - I didn't know what to think or how I felt. I had only seen you for about 10 minutes in the operating room at that point. I remember being so excited to see you again, but at the same time I felt a little strange because I wasn't quite sure who you were. It wasn't until a few days after you were born that I really began to understand that you were my child. Now, as you are sitting in my lap trying to go to sleep, I can say that you have completely captured my heart. Nothing has ever given me more joy than looking into your giant blue eyes. Nothing is more exciting to your daddy and I than watching your little sleep smiles and giggles. We are always try to capture those moments on video so that we can remember these times with you. Part of me is sad that one whole month of your life has already passed while part of me can't wait to watch you grow up.

I want to thank you for being such an easy baby. You hardly ever cry or fuss, although you do grunt quite a bit. At night, you let me know it's time to eat by grunting a little bit about every four hours. During the day you eat, then are wide awake for about an hour before falling asleep. Sometimes you fuss a little when it's time to sleep, but if you're given a pacifier and swaddled you are content as can be. I usually have to wake you up when it's time to eat again. I love the looks you get on your face when you eat. I love how utterly satisfied you look when you are full. I love the little bird noises you make in your sleep. I love how you put your arms out like you're flying when we burp you.

Your daddy loves you so much. He calls you his little guy or his little man. He loves to hold you, and he especially loves you to sleep on his chest. I often catch him hovering over you while you sleep to make sure you are still breathing. He gave you your first bottle today. For some reason, almost every time he changes your diaper you pee on him (well, most of it usually hits the wall). And although you have pooped all over our bed, peed on our toothbrushes and walls, and wake us up all night long - we couldn't be more thrilled to have you join our family.

I am satisfied. God has given us such an amazing gift in you, and has provided for all of our needs. It is my prayer that I will please the Lord in how I raise you.

Levi, you have changed our lives and you have filled our hearts. Please don't grow up too fast.

Love,
Your very proud Momma

Cure for writers block: a year in review

2009-01-08T10:11:00.000-08:00

I have had such a hard time blogging lately. I have about ten posts that I've started, but never finished. I think it's because there is just TOO many thoughts / emotions to get all out. So, to get me back into posting, I thought I would do a year in review.

2008 was probably the most life changing year I will ever have. Not only did we find out we were having a baby, we actually had the baby. With learning that we were expecting came other huge life changes. These changes came more emotionally and spiritually, rather than physically... but were significant enough that I feel like Jarrod and I changed as people more in 2008 than in our entire adult lives.

January
We had owned our third "flip" house for 2 weeks, and progress was going well.

February
We completed our house and moved most of the way in. We kept our large office furniture and washer and dryer at our apartment. We were hoping to sell the house before our lease was up and move back into our apartment until we found our next house. It looked like that plan was going to work, because we also got our first contract in February. Three contracts later, we actually sold the house (didn't actually end up closing until May).

March
In March, I got pregnant, and turned 26.

April
In April I found out I was pregnant and the lease on our apartment was up (yes, we overlapped our apartment and house for that long!) We moved the rest of our stuff (including the Christmas tree that was still up at our apartment) into the house.

May
we sold our house, and moved into yet another apartment. This apartment was meant to be very temporary while we looked for a house to buy as our permanent home. I had my first prenatal appointment on the 20th and learned we were 10 weeks along, and we got the first glimpse of our little guy.

June
we went on our last vacation as just the two of us to Galveston. During this trip, we spent some time in the emergency room thinking that we were losing our baby. We were thrilled when we got to see him wiggling around on the screen after waiting for 5 hours to see if he was still alive. Phoebe also got her girly parts removed this month.

July
In July, we found out we were having a BOY! I also became an Aunt for the first time! Little Michael James Brad Pier was born on July 22nd, four weeks early.

August
Our house hunt was not going well, and we learned that we would have to put way too much money down on a house to make it a viable option at this point, so we were looking into a more permanent apartment. We decided on the name Levi, and I finished his baby blanket.

September
We moved into our current apartment (if you're keeping track, that's four moves this year!!)

October
We started to put the nursery together, and I started to get REALLY fat

November
I had my first baby shower! and was counting down the days to Levi's arrival. the 20th was Jarrod and I's fourth wedding anniversary

December
Got to meet my son on December 9th.

untitled

2009-01-05T20:30:00.000-08:00

I have writers block

I'm not even a writer!

Adjusting to our new lives

2008-12-19T13:20:00.000-08:00

We've been home from the hosptial for 6 days, and adjusting well to our new lives. We are SO SO fortunate that Jarrod's job allows him to have the Holidays off, with the exception of Christmas gigs. These gigs take only a few hours a week, and make up for the loss of income from not being able to teach while school is out for the holidays. So, other than a few nights a week for a few hours, I have a partner with me to help me figure out what to do with this baby until school starts up again in January. I don't know how people do it alone, or with their partners gone to work all day.
I am recovering very well. Except for the set back of getting sick in the hospital, this recovery has been a breeze. I was up and walking around pretty well without much pain at all the next day. I needed help handling the baby, but it was way better than I was expecting it to be. Right now, I don't even feel like I had surgery last week (and I've felt like that for a few days now). I am able to do housework, and I even went to Target last night! It took everything in me not to stop everyone I saw to tell them about my new baby at home and whip out the cell phone pictures. (I ended up only showing the check out lady at Target.)

Levi has been truly amazing. I hope I'm not jinxing anything, but he has just been perfect. He pretty much only cries when he is getting his diaper changed, and he just kind of whimpers to let us know he needs something. He wakes up on his own like clockwork when he needs to eat every three hours (at night that is, I have to wake him during the day). He is the most alert just after he eats. He just keeps his eyes open WIDE and looks around and makes some great faces.

I love him!

Great news!

2008-12-18T11:27:00.000-08:00

I just found out through the biggest sleep smile I've seen on my boy, that he has dimples!!!!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Our initiation into parenthood....and dirty teeth

2008-12-16T08:47:00.000-08:00

I've heard all the "messy" baby stories, and I was prepared for one to happen to us sooner or later. I was not, however, expecting anything of this magnitude, especially so early in our parenting careers.

So, we had a blissful first night at home. He slept like an angel waking up like clockwork on his own exactly when he needed to eat. He would just kind of wiggle around and make little bird noises. No crying, no tears, no upsetness... just letting me know he was ready. It could not have been more perfect, we have such a good little baby.

So, it was time to get up and around in the morning and I was about to change Levi's diaper on our bed. I was sitting in bed and had Levi positioned in front of me in front of me. All night I had changed his diaper on the bed and didn"t even think about using the little portable vinyl changing pad. I was lucky enough to think about it this time. I asked Jarrod to hand it to me and saying how we should expect to be sprayed at any moment. I got his clothes and diaper off when he decided to let out an EXPLOSIVE toot, sending his baby poop flying toward me. I am telling you, this was projectile pooping!! luckily most of it stayed on the pad, with some damage done to the sheets and my clothes as well. The bad thing about most of it staying on the changing pad is that the side he lays on is a plastic type material, so all of his liquid poo pooled where he was laying, soaking poor naked baby in a huge puddle of poo. To make matters worse, Jarrod is trying to get out the door to a gig that he has that morning, and Phoebe still needed to go outside. I was in no shape to jump up and take action, or take Phoebe out, and Jarrod didn't really have the time to manage the crisis. I picked up our soaking baby, and before Jarrod got in there to take the changing pad from underneath him, he exploded once more :-). Jarrod got the pad and took it the toilet where he dumped it, and I held Levi up with poop COVERING his back from head to toe. Jarrod ran back with a blanket from the hospital to clean off most of the poop. Then I took baby wipes and cleaned the rest of his back. Poor baby was naked and freezing, I'm sure from the cold wipes. Jarrod called his mom and asked her to come over sooner rather than later, and Jarrod left for his gig. Deb came over and helped me with the laundry, and helped give Levi his first much needed bath.

Phew!

Of course, this was not our only brush with baby blowouts. The next day he had a very minor one, but the stains from the day before didn't come out of some of his clothes, so I decided to use a toothbrush to really scrub the pretreatment on his little outfit. We didn't have any old toothbrushes laying around, so Jarrod donated his current toothbrush to the cause. He would stop by the store and pick up another one. That night, we gave Levi another bath due to the blow out earlier that day. During his bath, he decided to pee straight up in the air, of course. The problem was, his stream on the way down landed precisely my toothbrush. It was pefectly aimed. No one could aim better if they tried. We almost died lauging. So, at the end of the day, Jarrod and I both lost our toothbrushes, and didn't get out to the store.

This morning, Levi has his first doctors appointment. We will be going with dirty teeth.

Levi Pictures (same ones as last post)

Pictures

2008-12-16T00:50:00.000-08:00

Go to this link to look at pictures of the first few days of Levi's life.

Pictures of Levi

Stay tuned for a great story about how Levi initiated me into motherhood our first morning at home. You'll like this one, I promise.

Recap

2008-12-14T17:16:00.001-08:00

Here is a recap of this week. I am mostly writing this so that I can remember all the events, and so I have it recorded to look back on in the future. Because of that, some of the details may be a little graphic for you, and the account is rather lengthy. Feel free to skip straight to the pictures. (to be added later)

Monday:

We have a doctors appointment at 9 in the morning to discuss possible dates for a C-section. He looks at his schedule and says he can't do Wednesday (which is what we were expecting, and hoping for). I was so disappointed, I thought I would have to wait longer to meet my little guy. Then he said "how about tomorrow morning?" What!?!? You'll give me my baby tomorrow? We finish up with the doctor, and go over to labor and delivery where I do some consent forms and paperwork and talk to the anesthesiologist about the epidural. I then come home to a MILLION things that I feel like I have to do to get ready for the arrival of our bundle of joy. I clean and clean and clean, do laundry, go to Walmart to buy some things we need, take a bath and have Jarrod help me prepare for my C-section so that I wouldn't have to have nurses do it for me the next day, try to give Phoebe a home grooming job (not a good idea). We stayed up until 1 in the morning and had to be at the hospital by 5:30 the next day.

Tuesday:

Woke up at 4:15. I actually slept for most of the three hours. The first thirty minutes I was fighting going to sleep, but once asleep I didn't wake up until my alarm went off. It was a surreal morning to say the least. I wasn't as nervous as I was expecting to be. We got to the hospital where my mom was already waiting for me. They set us up in a Labor room, and a nurse came in to do my IV and take my medical history. I was so cold in that room, and SO nervous for what was about to come. I remember looking at the clock at about 6:00 knowing that my epidural was an hour away. I can't even begin to tell you how scared I was about the epidural. I am not a needle fan... the IV was no fun, but I had no idea what to expect getting a shot in my spine. I half wanted the time to speed up so we could get it over with, and I half wanted time to stop so I wouldn't have to go through with this afterall. Finally, they came in to take me to the Operating Room. This was a really really strange feeling - walking into this room. It was a lot different than I was expecting. It was like something out of a Science fiction movie. The room was bright white, and there was stuff EVERYWHERE. Bright spotlights, a really funny looking bed, all kids of monitors and people wearing masks. A lot of people were there. I told the anesthesiologist I was nervous and went on doing my nervous babbling that I do. I was shaking and shivering uncontrollably, and thinking that I was going to get paralyzed because of how shaky I was. Finally they had my sit up on a table and bend over. I had a nurse in front of me telling me to arch my back, holding my knees and talking me through it. The doctor said "three wipes to clean you off, one, two, three." "now a small prick." I barely felt the prick of the numbing agent at all, but felt a weird sensation in my back. I figured the doctor would tell me when she put the epidural in, but she didn't. I just suddenly felt my legs get really really hot. I told the nurse, my legs are really warm and she told me that it was the medicine working. And that was it. NOTHING!!!!!! My legs started to get numb as they laid me down on the table. I didn't feel like they were numb enough though. The doctor came in and marked where my incision would be and I was scared because I could feel it. I told them that I could feel it and they responded that I would feel everything, but no pain. I didn't understand... I thought I would be completely dead. WRONG!!! I was very scared at this point. I started to get really sick feeling, and wanted to throw up, but couldn't take a deep enough breath to cough. I felt like I was drowning and needed to throw up. I told the people in the room, and in a few minutes I felt better - I assume they gave me something, but I don't know what. Then Jarrod came in the room. YAY!!! He kept saying "what's going on?" he wasn't asking literally what was going on, but more "this is really unreal, I can't believe this is actually happening. Okay, this is really weird - but the procedure itself actually felt really really good. My lower body was very warm - like being in a hot tub. I felt a whole lot of pulling and tugging which really felt like a massage. I kept telling Jarrod "this feels really good." I had no idea what was happening, I didn't know if they had even started yet. Then I heard a little tiny voice and Dr. Siri telling Jarrod to stand up. He got the klcamera out and got to see the delivery of his son. Then they held him over the curtain for me to see. He was a purple and white mess of goo. Jarrod and I were listening to the sound of our baby crying, and looking at each other. He was out of sight from either of us. We both were just like "is this really happening?" It was very unreal. Then they brought the baby over to Jarrod, and he held him where I could see for about 5 or 10 minutes. Then Jarrod got to leave with the baby to the nursery where they continued to work on him and do their tests while I was being put back together. Then they wheeled me to a recovery area where I laid alone for about 45 minutes wondering what was happening with my baby and why wasn't Jarrod with me? Then he came in with a coke in hand and told me all about my little boy. Then they took me to the post partum room where I would spend the next few days. I was expecting not to see the baby for a few hours, but a nurse came in and asked me if I would like to try breastfeeding before they gave him a bath. So, they brought him in. I held him and looked at him, and kissed him, and cuddled with him, and fed him. It was amazing - although still not quite real. He didn't really feel like my baby yet. Then they took him away to do his bath and warm him up. He would be gone for the next two hours. My parents, and Jarrods parents came in and out of the room going between looking at Levi in the nursery, and seeing me in my room. The rest of the day is kind of a blur. I was given some pretty heavy medications - and was told (and I was aware also) that I was pretty amusing. I kept falling asleep or something, because I kept having visions, or really really short dreams and not realizing they were dreams. I would talk about them with the people in the room, and they would laugh at me. I'd then realize that what I said didn't make any sense at all. This was really frusterating, because I was with it enough to know that I wasn't making any sense, but out of it enough that I couldn't stop myself from saying the most ridiculous things. Oh well, at least everyone got a good laugh.
The hospital doesn't allow the baby to stay in the room with you if everyone is asleep, so at night they took him to the nursery and brought him to me every three hours to eat. Feeding him was actually pretty easy, although Jarrod had to help a lot. Needless to say, we did not get much sleep at all that night. About an hour and a half of sleep every few hours.

Wednesday:

This is the day they made me get up for the first time. I was scared when the nurse came in and told me that I needed to get up. I had no idea what to expect from the pain, and I was pretty sure that getting your belly cut open and sewed back together would be painful to recover from. I was really surprised when I stood up that it really wasn't all that bad. I couldn't stand all the way up, and it wasn't exactly easy to walk, but the pain itself wasn't that bad. I was able to get off the IV and they brought me food for the first time. I was off of the IV pain medication, so I was able to hold real conversations with people. This is the day that I fell in love with my baby boy. I just wanted to hold him and cuddle him and love him and teach him everything. We had someone with us in the room from the morning until the evening every day which was both great and hard at the same time. I wasn't able to sleep during the day at all, and night time sleeping was next to impossible. It was also hard because I wanted everyone else to get the chance to hold the baby... so I pretty much was only holding him while trying to feed him, which got harder and more frustrating to do. It was great to see everyone, but I highly recommend ensuring that you have alone time during the day to hold your baby and sleep.

Thursday:

Lack of sleep, hormones, pain, more hormones, and emotional stress kicked in this day. I was exhausted beyond belief. I had only slept for 2 hours in a row max the past four days, and not even then, I only slept for a total of maybe 4 hours each night. By Thursday this really caught up to me. On top of that, I was full of pain medication, my milk had come in so I was in pain there, my hormones had just gone through the ringer, and I felt like I hadn't gotten any quality time with the baby. I was a mess, and it was all I could do to keep from crying all day. In the midst of all of that, however, I was full of so much joy it's indescribable. I was really excited about coming home the next day, and couldn't wait to get into my bed and spend some really good time with the baby. We asked that no one visit on Friday... which turned out to be the best decision because I ended up getting really sick on Friday.

Friday:

The doctor came in the morning and checked me out and said I was good to go. The baby's doctor also discharged Levi. This was a relief because he was jaundice and there was a chance that he would have had to stay in the nursery under the lights after I was already discharged. I was so happy to know that the baby was coming home with Jarrod and I. When I got out of bed that morning, I felt really sick to my stomach. I went to the nurses station to ask if they had anything they could give me for nausea. This happened several times throughout the day. Jarrod got us all packed up and ready to go. He took everything to the car, and came back up to the room. I wasn't feeling great, and I really wanted to take a nap, so we decided to take a nap before we left. When I got up, I was feeling really terrible again. One of the nurses told me that the nausea could have come from being "stopped up" if you know what I mean. So I went to the bathroom and tried very hard to get everything out. This was a painful process!! When I got up to wash my hands I suddenly had to throw up. After I was done throwing up, my body decided to give me the opposite problem as before, and emptied still more of my stomach contents. (I know this is gross). I was miserable. I went and lied down, then needed to go to the bathroom again. I told the nurse what was going on, and she called my doctor. The doctor then decided it was best to readmit me. They had to put me back on an IV to get me some fluids. I was disappointed that I wasn't getting to go home, but happy that I was at the hospital when I got sick. They managed my nausea, and kept me hydrated with fluids. Then... the horrible part of the day... my baby's nurse came in to inform me that the baby had been discharged from the hospital and would not be readmitted because there was no medical reason and also because he had been exposed to me and I could possibly have a virus that he could pass on to the other babies in the nursery. The nurses said that we would probably have to send him home, either with Jarrod, or have someone come pick him up and take him home while I stayed in the hospital. Needless to say, I was crushed, and all my emotions came out with the nurses in the room. I was so upset I couldn't believe it. Then later, they told me that his pediatrician called, and did not want the baby around me, for fear of getting him sick, but that he could be readmitted. So what ended up happening was that he had to stay in the nursery all night, and they had to bottle feed him. I was crushed by that as well. I really wanted to get breastfeeding off to a good start. I had even requested that he not be given a pacifier so that there would be no chance of nipple confusion. It was so important to me that he not have any bottles or pacifiers that could possibly interfere with breastfeeding. This was really a crushing blow that he had to be bottlefed that night. They did allow me to pump my own milk for him. They told me that they would give him whatever I produced, but they would probably have to supplement it with formula, since I probably wouldn't produce enough for him. They said even if it was only a drop, they would give it to him. To everyone's surprise, when they brough in the pump, I pumped TWO bottles full of milk for him!! Let me paint a funny picture for you. At one point during the day, a nurse came in to take my blood while I was pumping. I was physically exhausted and could barely sit up at all, and the pain in my breasts was almost unbearable - so Jarrod held the pump on my for me. So here I was in bed with a nurse drawing my blood, and Jarrod holding this contraption on me. It would have been a great picture for the scrapbook! Anyway, other than the fact that I was still euphoric about the baby, I had just about the worst night possible that night. I was missing my baby, I was torn apart by the fact that he was being bottlefed, I was physically exhausted beyond belief, I was off of my pain medication because it made me throw up - so I was in quite a bit of pain, I kept running to the bathroom... and eventually just set up shop in there on the toilet with my breast pump and IV. I was in there I think a total of 2 hours at one point. All the while my stomach is cramping because of the "runs" as well as the pain from the surgery, on top of that fact that my uterus was contracting due to the breastfeeding / pumping. MISERABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Physically, the worst night of my life, emotionally pretty hard being separated from my baby and having him being bottlefed. I kept my spirits up by reminding myself that it was only one night (hopefully), and that he was perfectly healthy and strong. I had a pefect baby, and we would leave the hospital soon.

Saturday:

I woke up after sleeping I think three WONDERFUL hours in a row. I felt pretty good. I did have to make some restroom stops a few times, but all my lab tests said that I could go home and be around the baby. The doctor confirmed this by noon, and we were all released from the hospital. When they brought Levi in to me, I was stingy, I didn't care who was around - I held him the whole time. When it came time to feed him, he latched on like a pro. There was no set back at all. We were on our way home by around 2 in the afternoon. I couldn't be more happy about going home!!

BABY LEVI!!!!

2008-12-10T15:37:00.000-08:00

This is Jarrod, and I have absolutely no idea what I am doing. It turned out that there was no Wi-Fi at the hospital at all, so that is why this blog hasn't been updated yet. I am at home for a couple hours, so I thought I'd try and post some pictures. Stef is up walking and doing well today, and Levi is great. He has had a lot of visitors and a lot of attention. On to the pictures...

This is Stef right before going into the O.R.

This is about 5 minutes after he was born, Stef's belly is being sewn up now.

Here's Momma and Baby

Levi in the Nursery with some combed hair! :-)

Paternal grandparents

Uncle Joe (my brother)

Maternal Grandfather

Granny

Happy Grandma

Baby Boy

last day to be pregnant!

2008-12-08T13:31:00.000-08:00

We will be going in tomorrow 5:30am for a C-section scheduled at 7:30. Whoa!

Tomorrow, I won't be pregnant anymore!!!

Tomorrow, I will meet my SON!

Will I miss being pregnant? If you would have asked me that 4 weeks ago, I would have said YES without hesitation. I have really enjoyed being pregnant, and have been SO fortunate to have such an easy pregnancy. But, as of today - am I going to miss being pregnant? NO! I am very disappointed that I am going to have a few weeks of pain and recovery after the baby is born... I was so looking forward to being able to flip over easily in bed, and not be so careful about how I move.

Here's me after my first Doctors appointment 10 weeks pregnant:

Here's big fat giant me after my last Drs appointment today. My last day of pregnancy

Me and Jarrod after our first Dr. Appointment holding up our sonogram pictures :-)

Me and Jarrod today, with our large baby :-)

Here are a few things that really helped make my pregnancy more comfortable / enjoyable:

1. My wonderful Adidas flip flops which I have in almost every color. I wore these all the way up until it got too cold just a few weeks ago. I wore them no matter how dressed up I was. I even wore them to the weddings I went to. Oh, what I would I have done without my Addidas flip flops?

2. MILK!!! I have always loved milk, but pregnancy made me crave milk more than ever. We always had to have two gallons of milk in the fridge at all times. I easily went though one gallon in a 24 hour period, but tried not to most of the time. Mostly, it took about two days to finish a gallon

3. BATHS!!! I took a bath probably 5 times a week. There were even days when I took two baths a day!

4. JARROD!! He was the best, and made my pregnancy much more comfortable and enjoyable. Thanks, babe.

We are bringing the lap top, and I'm showing Jarrod how to blog, so that he can update everyone as soon as possible tomorrow. Any prayers sent our way would be appreciated. Here is what I am in need of prayer for:

1. Calm nerves tonight, and a good nights sleep

2. Calm nerves tomorrow when the Doctor tries to put a needle in my spine!!

3. Calm nerves during the procedure

4. A healthy baby boy with strong lungs and heart and other vital organs

5. SANE grandmothers!! :-) Wait, this one is impossible.

"Last Hoorah"

2008-12-06T21:22:00.000-08:00

So tonight Jarrod and I thought "whoa, this might be our last weekend as just the two of us." A friend had two extra Mavs tickets, so we decided to go. We have a DART rail station right by our apartment, so we took the train to Mockingbird station, got off and had some starbucks, then went on to the American Airlines Center.

***Let me pause right here and say how blessed and grateful I am that I, in my 39th week of pregnancy, feel good enough to go on a morning walk with Phoebe, then show houses to clients all morning, then go to a park with Jarrod and Phoebe and watch them run around, then walk to the rail line, ride the rail all the way downtown, walk around mockingbird station, then sit at a Mavs game for a few hours (after walking halfway around the Stadium looking for a french fry vendor), walk back to the station, walk home from the station, get our puppy and take her on a long walk. I am a very lucky giant pregnant lady!!***

Anyway, the DART was interesting. Let me share a few of the highlights:

1. A blind man getting on the train and sitting on someone already seated
2. A man with a Honeydew melon in his lap, rubbing and patting it
3. A man much taller than Jarrod with very long hair and pink fingernails making scary faces at himself in the reflection
4. A strange lady coming up to me asking for one of my Starbursts-Requesting not to have the Red, or the Orange - she wanted green, but settled for yellow.
5. A very excited and loud African American fellow asking the other African American passengers if they were excited about having "a black president."

I did briefly think after we got on the DART, what would happen if my water broke, or I went in to labor while at the Mavs game or on the train. That would have been a story to remember.

All in all, Jarrod and I had a very nice last Saturday (probably). I think the Mavericks might have been playing the Hawks. I wasn't paying too much attention.

Update

2008-12-04T07:28:00.000-08:00

We won't have any news until our Doctor's appointment on Monday.

I was hoping that maybe Monday would be his birthday, guess that's out of the question, but hopefully it can still be that week.

My Clinically Large Baby

2008-12-03T09:20:00.000-08:00

So, I had the sonogram today, and it confirmed my doctors suspision. The sonographer estimated that he weighs close to nine pounds. I asked her how accurate that was, and she said pretty accurate with about 1/2 pound margin of error. She said if this is wrong, I would err on the big side... he could be more like 9.5 pounds, and probably not less than 9 pounds.

I left a note for the doctor to call me so that we can get this C-section scheduled. I would ideally like to be out of the hospital by Saturday, the 13th, because Jarrod has gigs all day that day. I don't want to be in the hospital without him

So, depending on what the doc says, we may be having this baby very soon!

Long post, it's been a while...

2008-12-01T11:35:00.001-08:00

Looks like Phoebe may be getting a pretty big little brother.

This is a "complication" (I wouldn't call it that) that we did not see coming. Everyone who asks me how far along I am mentions that I look so small to be so close to my due date. My weight gain has been right on track with what the books say, (and up until recently a little less). So when the doctor measured me last week and said that it looks like I have a 7+lbs baby already, I was a little surprised.

I had an appointment today, and he said the baby seems to be between 7.5 - 8 lbs already. He scheduled me for a sonogram to do an estimate on weight on Wednesday.

This is kind of a funny twist in the pregnancy. He was breech until very recently, making me think I was going to need a C-section. I came to terms with a C-section, and actually felt relieved about delivering that way. Then the baby turned, forcing me to think about getting this baby out of me the natural way. I went back and forth for a while trying to justify having a C-section anyway, for fear of child birth. A few weeks ago, I really had a peace about having a vaginal birth, and was looking forward to having the baby placed on my abdomen immediately after birth. I was super excited about gaining some mobility after the baby is born. It is so much harder for me to get up and down, and turn over in bed, and get in and out of cars and bathtubs. I was looking forward to delivering the baby, then being able to flip over in bed easily. I had actually visualized pushing the baby out, and then them placing him on belly and getting to meet him with an accompaning sense of accomplishment knowing that I delivered this boy. I thought about how proud Jarrod would be of me after going through that ordeal. Now, I am looking at the possibility of a C-section again.

Yes, I know many women who have delivered large babies vaginally (my mother being one of them... and with no pain medication, sorry mom). I also know that I am not too keen on anything traveling through that area of my body in the first place, let alone if it's too tight of a squeeze. The doctor that I use recommends a C-section for babies who are over 9lbs.

So, we'll see what the sonogram has to say on Wednesday, although those aren't entirely accurate. But, if the doctor thinks he's large with his 25 years of experience, and the sonogram confirms his suspision... there probably isn't much chance of this being a nice 6-7 lb baby. When I took the paperwork to the receptionist to schedule my sonogram appointment, I saw on the sheet that the doctor had written as the reason for the sonogram: "Clinically large baby" YIKES.

In other news, I feel pretty ready for him. My mom was in town over thanksgiving, and came over on Friday to help me get everything organized and washed and set up in the baby's room. At this point, I don't think I need anything else! (I am waiting on two packages in the mail 1. a miracle blanket that some friends insisted is a great investment 2. my restoration hardware goodies from my hostesses at my shower!!) We have installed the car seat in the car and it's being checked by the fire department tomorrow, his diaper bag is packed, his clothes blankets and towels are clean, his bottles are washed, his drawers are organized, his clothes are put away. I don't have my hospital bags packed, although I don't think I'm in any rush to get that done, seeing as though the baby has not dropped yet, and I'm only barely .5 cm dialated. I guess the baby heard it was getting pretty cold here. He's nice and comfortable in his warm little bubble and doesn't seem to be in a hurry to arrive. (honestly, I think I'm in that comfortable bubble too. I realize that I have NO idea how drastically life is going to change in a matter of days from now.) But...

I believe in a sovereign God who decided to open my womb at this particular period in my life. He will provide the best exit strategy for the little guy. He has been preparing Jarrod and I's hearts for parenthood... and although I have my fears, I know that the Lord has given me the strength to endure both childbirth, whichever way it happens, as well as motherhood. He has provided me a great support system, and a cute little puppy. What more could I ask for?

Enjoy the pics and video:

Lucky

2008-11-19T20:18:00.000-08:00

4 years ago today I was coming to the end of what seemed to be the longest countdown ever. The countdown started at 241 days, and ended on November 20, 2004, when I got to marry my best friend.

After 4 years of dating, we got married. After 4 years of marriage, we're having a baby. I wonder where we'll be 4 years from now?

During our 4 years of marriage:

We have lived in 8 different places
We have Flipped 3 properties
We have Gone through 6 cars
I have had 6 different jobs
We have Started our own business
We have adopted a dog
Got have created a whole human person

Phew!!!

I know the readers of my blog know that I am crazy about my husband. He is a fantastic person who I enjoy being with more than anyone else. In the last four years our lives have drastically changed, as well as our perspectives and priorities. We have learned a lot of lessons, and encouraged each other through very trying times. We are totally different people today than we were when we were first married. Thankfully, the Lord allowed us to grow in the same direction, bringing us closer and closer together. I pray that this continues throughout our marriage.

Jarrod takes his role as a husband seriously, and acts in this role according to scripture. He truly is a servant leader, sacrificing himself daily for me. He leads this household with integrity. I can trust that decisions he makes are made prayerfully and with the right perspective, making it easy to submit to his authority.

I have been blessed beyond measure, and can't wait to spend the next however many years the Lord grants us together. I still remember what we said when we exchanged rings... I love it:

"With this ring, I thee wed and say to the world 'this is my husband, whom I cherish above all others.'"

Thank you for being my team-mate, my partner, my best friend, my protector, my spiritual leader, my back massager, my roach killer, my jar opener, my trash taker outer, my encourager, my safe place to vent, my accountability partner, my problem solver, my shoulder to cry on, my prayer partner, my coffee loving, tuba playing, God fearing, Phoebe chasing, poker playing, taco bueno eating, Mcdonald's Monopoly playing, treasure hunting, eschatology reading, husband and soon to be father of my son.

Now, a tribute to the past eight years:

Helpful Household Tip

2008-11-15T15:53:00.001-08:00

So, the next time you find yourself lying in bed trying to take a nap at 5:00pm and you get a craving for fried cauliflower (who craves fried cauliflower anyway?), I do NOT recommend you do the following:

Do not fill your small pot almost all the way up with oil.
Do not then heat this oil on the very highest setting
Do not then dump a large amount of battered cauliflower into this very hot oil

If you do these things, you may end up having the oil instantly boil over, spilling ALL over your smoothtop range onto other heated elements. This may cause you to fear that your stove will soon catch fire. If your stove does catch fire, it's best if you are wearing a shirt so that you can run outside quickly. If your stove does not catch fire, you will still wind up with a house FULL of smoke.

You have been warned.

Manager of Quality Control

2008-11-10T08:00:00.001-08:00

So Jarrod was putting together the baby swing, and Phoebe was very interested in what was happening. She got especially curious when the little dangly toys went up.

After the swing was complete, Phoebe felt the need to test it and make sure that it was stable enough for her little brother. So we let her. We put her in the swing, and she rocked it back and forth and back and forth. I think she was actually trying to get it to stop swinging, but her efforts failed her, and she only managed to get it to swing harder and harder. I laughed so hard (not good when you're 9 months pregnant with a 5 lb+ baby sitting atop your bladder), then ran and got the camera (well, more like wabbled briskly to get the camera).

The swing does not have batteries yet, Phoebe is the one swinging it! I love that girl so much.

Shower Time!!!

2008-11-07T06:44:00.001-08:00

So, Sunday I had a baby shower. I still think it's weird that I would even be having a baby shower... I'm having a baby!!

My best friend in the whole wide world put it together (with a help of a few other friends, of course.) She WAY out did herself! I knew she would... that's just the kind of friend she is.

I came in the door and saw the table, and a GORGEOUS present in the middle

Wait a second... that's not a present... THAT'S THE CAKE!!! Wow, what an awesome cake. It was red velvet too, my favorite.

Here are my hostesses: Ashley, Carissa, (fat me), Jennifer

Here is one of my favorite people with a rattle fruit pie (which I just finished the last of for breakfast this morning.) I was so touched that she wanted to be a part of the shower. She sent out the invites, and flew here on a weekend off from her Orchestra job in Naples, Florida. She is a newly wed, and her husband is living in Illinois where he is a professor at Wheaton. She has been splitting her time between her job in Florida, and her heart in Illinois. She chose to spend one of those precious weekends she could have spent with her new husband celebrating her friend. It meant SO much to me. This is after I had the wrong date written down in my calendar for her wedding shower back in March. I got a call from one of the other hostesses (yes, I was a hostess for this event) asking where I was. I couldn't believe I had the wrong day, especially since it was the day after my birthday! A funny side note about her shower: all the other hostesses at her shower were pregnant at the time. They were all talking about being pregnant, and at the time I did not think I was able to get pregnant on my own. I left the shower kind of bummed wondering how and when and even if I would ever get to be pregnant. Well, turns out I was 1 day pregnant at the shower myself!! Ashley, thank you so much for being there... that was the best present of the whole shower!

Jennifer put together some really fun games for the shower. I am usually not a fan of shower games, and there are some pretty awful and embarrassing ones for baby showers, but this one was great! I had never heard of it before. Everyone seemed to really enjoy it. In the picture above there are packages spelling "It's a Boy." There was a baby related item in each bag that started with the corresponding letter. We were supposed to guess what it was. Me and my mom and my friend Janelle worked collaboratively and came up with the most correct items :-)

And this is me at home with only a portion of the gifts shown. Jarrod had a good time going through all the packages to see what we got.

I was overwhelmed to say the least at the shower itself. All the thought and preparation that went into it, and the graciousness of Jarrods granparents for giving us such a great venue to have it in. Then all the people who gave of their time to come, not to mention the wonderful gifts that my baby has now. He actually owns things! I'm feeling a little closer to ready for him now.

Speaking of being ready for him, I wrote down the baby related activities coming up. There is one every week until the baby is born... look how soon he is coming:

Nov. 9th : baby shower at church
Nov. 15th: Child birth class!!! AHH!
Nov. 18th: Sonogram and Dr. Appt. (sonogram is just a quick run in to find out if he's still breech so we can schedule the C Section at the Drs appointment if he is)
Nov. 23rd : a tour of the maternity ward where we will deliver. (our childbirth class is at a different hospital. Jarrod was playing with Charleston Symphony the weekend we had originally planned to have the class.)
Nov. 28 : Thanksgiving, and my mom helping me organize the nursery
Dec. 2nd: breastfeeding class
Then: BABY ANY DAY!!!!

In between all the fun baby stuff, we also have Thanksgiving and a wedding anniversary (4 years!!) I have a feeling this will be a pretty busy fast moving last 4-5 weeks we have left!

Unbelievable...

2008-11-04T20:27:00.000-08:00

I can't wait to post about the incredible baby shower that Jennifer, Ashley, and Carissa threw for me at my wonderful Grandparents in law's home on Sunday... But, I'm waiting on a few pictures to go along with the post.

So instead, I will tell you about a 2 traumatic experiences I had today. TRAUMATIC!

1. A little background: I don't like water. I don't like to drink it either, but mostly I don't want it in my face. I do not swim, I don't want to put my face in the water. I took only baths so I could keep my face out of the water until I was forced to shower on a college campus (since then I have graduated to showers, but still LOVE the occasional... okay, frequent... bath). When I wash my face, soap is gently applied to everywhere but my eyes and surrounding area and then wiped off with wet hands or rag... water is NEVER splashed onto my face under any circumstances EVER. My eyes mostly remain shut in the shower for fear of getting water into them. So, this morning (okay, afternoon) I was taking my shower before leaving to go to my 34 week check up, and I was getting the soap out of the wall mounted soap dispenser (at eye level). As the cap to the soap closed, a HUGE glob of blue mentholated body wash with those tiny scrubber balls FLEW into my EYEBALL!!! It took a few seconds before the pain set in. Then, an incredible amount of pain and sheer panic. What do I do? It's too painful to open my eye, let alone open it and splash water into it! All I wanted to do was close my eye as hard as I could and put a towel on my face and rub my eye... but I knew that was the last thing I should do. I kept repeating "Help me, God... Help me, God." I really thought I was never going to be able to open my eye, and that I would have to call someone to drive me to the doctors appointment. (I will point out also that I have near perfect sight in one eye, and my other eye is pretty much there for decoration. The soap went into the good eye. I also was not born with the ability to only open one eye, so I had to keep both of my eyes closed this whole time) Anyway, I was able to muster enough courage to open my eyes, and I pooled some water into my palm and placed my face in it (I probably didn't get it anywhere close to my eye... who knows.) It turned out fine. It stung for a few hours though.

2. Can it get more traumatic than that? Yes, it most certainly can. No background needed for this one. I am your typical girl, and I'm sure many would have reacted similarly. We were over at my in-laws house, and we were getting ready to leave. We just put Phoebe's leash on, and I slipped on my flip flops. Deb (my mother-in-law) mentioned that Phoebe seemed rather interested in my shoes. I looked down and she was "pouncing" on them. I took a few steps, and she kept on. I couldn't think of why she was doing this. Then I felt my leg and realized that a bug probably was on my shoe, and was now lodged in my pants. At this point, I was not panicked... I just told Jarrod and Deb "I think there is a bug in my pants." Jarrod ordered me to the bathroom to take off my pants and see. I told him I didn't want to take them off because I didn't want to see it if there was one - but what other option did I have, really? So I went into the bathroom and pulled my pants down, and what did I see!?!??!?!?! A GIANT ROACH!!!!!!! A GIANT ROACH WAS IN MY PANTS!!! A GIANT ROACH WAS ON MY SHOE AND CRAWLED UP MY LEG AND WAS IN MY PANTS!!!!! I proceeded to scream, and freak out and flail myself around the bathroom like a fool. I came out of the bathroom (the roach trailing behind me), and informed Deb and Jarrod, who were already in tears from laughing so hard. I was a combination laughing and crying, and just being hysterical in general. This was ugly. If you've ever seen me really really laugh, you've seen me uncontrollably snort and cough. Not cute, not pretty and only a few have seen it. Add in some tears and hysterics to this already wobbly totally un graceful nearly nine month pregnant lady... and you have quite a show. I kept feeling it on my leg, and kept imagining it going up my pants. Unbelievable.

I am very well aware that I am prone to hysterics, and that neither one of these experiences would have been traumatic to most... but these two events will go down in Stef history as some of the most terrifying experiences of my life. Pitiful, I know.

2008-11-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

Last night was a fun night. Jarrod got called to play with the Dallas Symphony, and the concert was just fun! It was "Around the world with Walt Disney." The highlights of the program for me were The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast and the Lion King. They projected scenes from the movie on a screen above the orchestra as they played.

I know I have a degree in music, and I really do love listening to the greatest classical works being performed by a world class symphony (especially when my husband is playing)... but I have to admit, I was more excited about this "Pops" concert than any other "real" concert he's done. Is that really bad of me? I guess I'm not as cultured as I thought. Although, I do think I would take Mahler'S 5th Symphony, or Strauss' Ein Heldenleben over this concert (both of which were performed last month, and both of which we thought at one point Jarrod might have the chance of playing.)

There was a costume contest, and I was expecting to see a lot of kids dressed up. I was disappointed that there weren't more kids. I guess they'd rather go trick or treating than go to the symphony. Go figure. I did see quite a few elderly people decked out in their orange socks, and Halloween hats, scarfs, and earrings though!!

I almost made it a whole post without mentioning the baby in any way!

But, this is the first day that I get to say, as Jennifer reminded me yesterday:

I AM HAVING A BABY NEXT MONTH!!!!!!

NURSERY!!!!

2008-10-28T21:21:00.000-07:00

The nursery is almost complete! All the major furnishings and wall hangings are up. I would love to add a rug, but we'll see.

These are the pictures hanging above the glider. I made these in power point, and got the frames at IKEA for $1.99 each. Jarrods brother spray painted them for me. Thanks, Joe. (I put the Lion in the middle because for some reason it reminds me of Phoebe. I don't know if it's the look on it's face, or the cock of it's head...)

Close up of the paintings I did over the baby's crib. Can you tell we were on a budget? :-) It's amazing what you can do, though, without spending a lot of money.

Here's a sweet moment with Jarrod imagining what it will be like to hold his "little guy."

Umm...Yeah, that didn't last long. Here's my real Jarrod: holding the baby upside down.

My two babies

2008-10-28T13:04:00.000-07:00

My baby boy is now the same size as my baby girl!!