Thursday, July 24, 2008

An emotional pile of mush...

I have always been a very emotional person. I have always cried at graduation ceremonies where I don't even know anyone who is graduating (just playing in the band, usually.) Of course I always cry at the usual weddings, funerals, sad/happy movies... but lately I've been being choked up for the strangest reasons... or really no reason at all.

I helped my mother in law out by watching the kids she watches during the day for a few days this week. I took the five year old to story time at the library, and got choked up during the "if you're happy and you know it" song. Just seeing / hearing all the little innocent kids laughing and singing and dancing was more than a blubbering expectant mother can take. If it's not story time, it's a song on the radio, or a news story, or just going into taco bell.

So of course today when I checked the mail... I lost it. My good friend sent me the Jesus story book in the mail. I had actually been planning on purchasing this book, and had looked for it a few times while I've been out. The book has been highly recommended on a blog that I love.

I was so touched by this gesture, and that alone got me choked up. Then I started flipping through the pages, and imagined reading these stories to my son. I thought about what I would say to fill in some of the necessary gaps in this childrens book. I thought about reading it to him when he's first born and can't understand anything and doesn't realize that I'm reading to him... and I imagined reading it to him when he's a toddler / young school age. At one point in the book, they paraphrase the Lord's prayer and I was in the car with Jarrod and started reading it outloud to him, but couldn't get the words out because I was crying. Poor Jarrod! I'm a MESS!!! Does this get better after the kid is born and the hormones calm down a bit?

Thank you so much, friend, for such a thoughtful gift. I'm sure the pages will be wet with tears, and fully worn out in a few years... just as it should be.

*update* shortly after reading this post, Jarrod thought it would be a fantastic idea to read me stories out of Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul. I think he's enjoying my emotional instability a little too much.


jennypen said...

What a nice friend you have to send you such a meaningful gift for your child. I wish I had a friend like that, too. Wait - I DO! I can't wait to start reading it but must wait 'til after Monday. And I don't think you're crazy at all! You're doing great; gushy-emotional is WAY better than impossible-to-live-with- emotional. (Just ask my hubby.)

GloryandGrace said...

Love you, friend. I got a bit teary myself thinking of you reading this to your son. From what I've read, the author writes this in such a wonderful way, not only accurately portraying the Gospel, but also writing in such a way that parents can clearly fill in the necessary gaps here and there as you mentioned.

I can't wait for all the wonderful memories you're going make with this precious boy in the months and years to come!!

Aaron and April said...

I'm going to have to look for that little book for Michael.

As far as the emotions, Michael is almost a week old and I'm still incredibly emotional. Your baby does things that you can't help but tear up at. I still look at him and almost cry every time I see him. They're such a blessing that you're overwhelmed everytime you look at them.

BreAnna Fowler said...

I found you through Eryn's and Jennifer's blogs. I am a mommy of four and can say, yes you will return to your "old" self. It takes a while, especially if you are nursing! The little Bible you received is incredible and you read it to that baby in utero if you want! As I was reading your blog I was reminded of Deuteronomy 6:4-7, where it talks about "teaching your sons diligently when you sit down in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up."
Congratulations and may the Lord bless little Levi! Sounds like he got great parents.


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